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The Weirdest Google Searches For Lindsey Graham

by Kim Lyons

He's been in Congress since 1994 and was a politician in his home state of South Carolina before that, so a Google search for Lindsey Graham should produce plenty of results, weird and otherwise, right? So far, the two biggest events of Graham's presidential campaign have been his nervous performance during the debate on Fox News (the 5 p.m. debate, not the prime-time Trump-fest), and then there was the time Donald Trump gave out Graham's personal cell phone number. Graham, apparently not realizing you can just change your phone number, went ahead and destroyed his actual phone in a sort of weird video.

So national voters haven't really had a chance to get to know Graham the presidential candidate very well (and if his poll numbers don't improve soon, they may not get much of a chance to know him at all). How do you get information in this day and age? By conducting a Google search, obviously. He's apparently very quotable, especially when it comes to Hillary Clinton and wacky stuff like civil rights, and his single status and height are all areas of interest for curious Googlers. I tried a few variations of searches to see what is lurking in the weird corners of the Internet about Lindsey Graham.

"Why Isn't Lindsey Graham Married?"

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Graham has had several serious girlfriends but has never been married and has no children. If elected, Graham has said he will have a "rotating First Lady" (huh?), which would include his sister Darline. In his memoir My Story, Graham says his marital status has to do mostly with timing: "The opportunity never presented itself at the right time, or I never found time to meet the right girl, or the right girl was smart enough not to have time for me," he wrote.

"How Tall Is Lindsey Graham?"

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Graham’s height is 5 feet, 7.5 inches, according to The Post and Courier, which the paper notes would make him one of the country's shortest presidents if he's elected. Most presidents have averaged about 5 feet and 10 inches. But he wouldn't be the shortest president ever. That distinction still belongs to 5-foot-4-inch James Madison.

"Lindsey Graham Drone"

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This is where the weird starts. Graham told a fundraising breakfast in May that if he learned someone was planning a terrorist attack, he as president would give them problems with an unmanned aircraft. "I'm not going to call a judge, I'm going to call a drone, and we will kill you," he said.

"Lindsey Graham Lawyer"

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He got very agitated during a 2011 Senate debate about how to treat people suspected of joining terrorist organizations, The New York Times reported: "When they say 'I want my lawyer,' you tell them, 'Shut up. You don't get a lawyer. You are an enemy combatant.'"

A simpler search for Graham's name, "Lindsey Graham is...," turned up as its first and only instant search result "...is running for president." Hopefully if he stays in the race, Graham will continue to be quotable and a little off-kilter and hire someone to help improve his SEO results.