Life

How To Help A Homesick Roommate In College

by Chrissa Hardy

Unless you're coming from a miserable, prison-like existence, feeling homesick in a new place is a given. Humans seek comfort and familiarity, and starting college without any friends can make a person feel extremely alone. So when you've got a roommate suffering from homesickness, hopefully you can understand the struggle — because the struggle is real, y'all.

If you are able to quickly get through your own bout of this emotional distress, then you're one of the lucky ones. It's not something that most people can easily shake. Fear is intense and crippling, and being homesick is basically being afraid of the entirely new faces and surroundings you're experiencing. The only way to get through it is to get through it, hopefully, with the support of understanding roommates, friends, and classmates who will dull the ache with endless giggles and pizza.

And since your roommate is one of the first people you meet on campus, you need to lean on each other pretty heavily to get through it together. If your roomie is stuck in a dreary, mopey, depressing homesick bubble, you can easily bring her out of it — because she would totally do it for you. Here's how you can help.

1. Invite her out

If she's homesick, she's probably not leading the charge on a night out. She's most likely gazing at a collage of photos of her and her high school friends. Maybe she's texting them like crazy, and maybe she's crying into her Greek yogurt, because it's a snack she used to have with her bestie, and now she has to eat it all alone. Snap her out of that funk by insisting she get out of the dorm room for a night. She won't regret it, and it'll definitely bring you two closer.

2. Give her space

Sometimes, people just need some time to wallow. It's healthy, as long as it doesn't happen constantly. So when she needs to Skype her mom and laze around in her PJs, just go with it.

3. Embrace your shared interests

Living with someone you don't know forces you to find things you have in common, almost immediately. Once you determine what those shared interests are, go with it. You both love froyo? Great, make plans for an off-campus froyo date. You both can't get enough of the movie Clueless? Awesome, order some Chinese take-out, and swoon over a young Paul Rudd. You'll learn more about each other, and that new bond will slowly melt the homesick iceberg that's currently surrounding her heart.

4. Show her your vulnerable side

If she's homesick, then she's feeling vulnerable 24/7. If you show her your vulnerable side, she won't feel as much like a weirdo/baby/slob monster.

5. Introduce her to your friends

She needs to make friends of her own, but until she's comfortable putting herself out there, introduce her to the loyal crew you've begun to form. At the very least, it'll distract her from the people she's desperately missing.

6. Veg out regularly

This is a therapeutic must for a healing soul. Pick a sitcom, select auto-play, and surround yourselves with lots of sweet and salty snacks. Because there's no problem that an abundance of Friends and Reese's Cups can't fix.

Image: Pexels; Giphy (6)