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Donald Trump's Jury Duty Isn't An Accident

by Kendyl Kearly

Look, the American legal system often fails, but it's still a respected part of the nation's history. Unfortunately, a certain someone has been added to the mix, which is not — repeat, not — going to do much for the system's credibility. Oh, yes: Donald Trump is breaking from campaigning for jury duty in New York Monday morning. (Maybe someone just took pity on the United States, which can't handle much more of Trump's campaign at this point?)

Trump mentioned his Monday jury duty at a press conference on Friday, saying, "Can you believe — I'll be doing jury duty on Monday morning. I'm looking forward to it. I think it’s fun." One of his lawyers told the New York Daily News, "Despite running for president and running a massive, multi-billion-dollar company, Mr. Trump will be at jury duty Monday."

The timing is certainly a little suspicious. Trump has avoided five jury summons since 2006 and got charged $250. It stands to reason that campaigning instead of serving on jury duty would be more valuable to him than $250, so why did he suddenly feel the need to share his wisdom from the jury bench?

Honestly, I'm guessing that this is a very strategic move by Trump's advisers. One criticism of their candidate is that it's hard for voters to imagine him doing the nitty-gritty administrative work that the chief executive would face every day. Jury duty could imply that he can do unexciting tasks, make important decisions, and be a serious player.

Jury duty also gives him some semblance of federal credibility. Although Trump has been presenting his lack of political experience as a disconnect from the broken Washington machine, jury duty is an easy way for him to be put in a responsible, government role that doesn't take too much time or a winning election.

However, Trump's appearance as a juror isn't exactly making the legal system appear especially trustworthy. I mean, if I were involved in any case — whether as a defendant, plaintiff, judge, fellow juror, anything — I would not want Trump there. Seriously. Here are Trump's eight most revolting quotes on justice, law, and notable criminals that prove he has no place in a courtroom.

On Elizabeth Beck

The real travesty here. Trump might have to try to be an understanding human being.

On Judges

I hope he says the same thing to the judge in this week's case.

On Kate's Law

Because we should always care more when the victim is beautiful and the perpetrator is of a different ethnicity. This is the strategy all jurors should have.

On Ferguson

They could use those powers of deduction on the bench.

On Oscar Pistorius

I pity whoever has to argue with Trump in that courtroom. His evidence is rock solid.

On Zimmerman

Trump is no angel, but showmanship and pleas for attention left the American public with little other choice than to watch him.

On Lawyers

Will anyone there be able to recognize Trump as a juror instead of a defendant in a lawsuit?

On Obama

If only Trump were a juror in that case...