Life

Venmo Notes: What You Say Vs. What You Mean

Most of us have heard of Venmo, the money-sharing app with a social media twist that allows users to post notes along with their payment for all the world to see. But what you say on your Venmo notes versus what you really mean are often two completely different things — and when that your friend Derek has sent your friend Mason a payment along with a peach emoji, he's probably not paying him for peaches,

To quickly refresh the forgetful or unfamiliar: Venmo is an app that allows you both to send money to and receive it from other people. First beta tested in 2009 and officially launched in 2012, it has quickly gained popularity in our mostly cash-free world where you can't immediately pay people back for when they spot you. The app is even more efficient than transferring money between two different banks, because depending on the two banks in question, that money transfer can take three days or more; Venmo, however, is instantaneous.

When you first download Venmo, you usually sign on with your Facebook account and hook it up with your bank account, enabling you to make payments to anyone you're friends with on Facebook. Then, the app's social media part comes in: Whenever you make or receive a payment, you're required to add a little note detailing what the payment is for. Though both your friends and the recipient's friends will see the note (unless you elect to make all Venmo activity private), the dollar amount will remain undisclosed to the public.

If you're the type of person who likes to scroll through the Venmo homepage to see who's paying whom for what, you'll already know that you can "like" people's payments. It's a little strange if you ask me, but who am I to resist the future? Plus, Venmo ensures only the highest security, so we can trust our bank information and payment history will remain secure and private. Right, guys?

But what kinds of things do people say on these payment notes, anyway? And do they actually mean what they say? Let's take a look at some potential examples of what people say they're using Venmo for versus what they're really using it for.

1. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"ROLLIN DOWN THE STREET, SMOKIN INDO, SIPPIN ON GIN AND JUICE."

What The Payment Is Actually For:

You shared an Uber to Trader Joe's with your roommate, but you couldn't just split the ride in the Uber app itself because you've been banned from it for not updating your payment information. There was no gin or juice involved, even at the grocery store, where all you ended up buying was some lentil chips because you were hungry, but you're on a budget.

2. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"100 margaritas!"

What The Payment Is Actually For:

A bottle of the cheapest wine your friend could find (somewhere between $10 and $12, please), which you'll probably only partially finish before you fall asleep watching old standup.

3. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"I'm sorry."

What The Payment Is Actually For:

You got mad at the party last night because your ex wouldn't text you back, so you punched a hole in the wall. It seemed OK at the time because you were drunk on either cheap wine or gin and juice, but when you woke up to bloody knuckles and, you know, a hole in your friend's wall, you realized it was clearly not OK. You don't really know how much it costs to fix that kind of thing, so you Venmo your friend 20 bucks and call it good. (You hope.)

4. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"Gourmet dinner on the pier!"

What The Payment Is Actually For:

Three cheeseburgers from the nearest fast food joint.

5. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"I got the gas and the coke. I don't sell molly no more."

What The Payment Is Actually For:

Just gas. No cocaine. You never sold molly. Because that would be illegal.

6. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"Getting turnt at the club!"

What The Payment Is Actually For:

You didn't know there was a cover, so you spent the only $10 you had on that. Because you had no other money, you had your friend buy you an IPA on tap. Needless to say, you were too broke to get turnt.

7. What Your Venmo Note Says:

"I love you!"

What The Payment Is Actually For:

Loving the other person. Which sometimes comes in the form of cash money.

Images: Giphy (7); Venmo/Facebook