Books

15 Weird Things True Harry Potter Fans Do

by Julia Seales

If you are a Harry Potter fan, chances are there are words, phrases, and situations that take on a whole new meaning. For example: if anyone ever asks the question, “How many are there?” I will immediately scream “36 BUT LAST YEAR LAST YEAR THERE WERE 37!”

My graduation gown wasn’t a graduation gown; it was a Hogwarts robe. Sticks aren’t sticks; they’re wands. If I see a triangle, I’m going to draw a circle and line in it to create the Deathly Hallows. All of this is just everyday life when you’re a Harry Potter fan.

All in all, most of these things aren’t too weird. OK, maybe shouting movie lines from Sorcerer’s Stone is a little bizarre, and might make people turn their heads if you do it in public. But this doesn’t mean you need to stop. Because chances are, there’s another Potter fan somewhere in your vicinity who will appreciate your hardcore love for such an epic series. And even if Muggles think you’re weird, who cares? As Ron says, don’t let the Muggles get you down. You keep doing and thinking all those weird things, Potter fans. That weirdness is what bonds us together in this magical fandom.

1. Whenever You See An Owl, You Think About Getting The Mail

If you ever see an owl flying around, you immediately start humming Hedwig's Theme. And if you see it during the day, anywhere near your house, you have to check the post immediately. Because what if this is the letter you've been waiting for? (And of course, you think this no matter how many years have passed since you turned 11...)

2. When You See Cats (And Other Animals), You Wonder If They're Animagi

Whenever you spy a tabby cat, you immediately think "Professor McGonagall." And if you hated rats before, you definitely hate them now. As for stray dogs... in your mind you just call them all "Sirius."

3. You Kind Of Want A Cupboard Under Your Stairs

True story: When I was younger, I was so obsessed with Harry Potter that my dad built me a cupboard under the basement stairs. There's a little door and carpet inside and even a few spiders. Dream come true.

4. You Try Speaking In Parseltongue

Whenever you come across a snake, you can't help whispering heSHHHiiihaSEEEEhaSiHETHHHHH, just to see if maybe, maybe, you're a Parselmouth. After all, Harry didn't know that he was!

5. You've Mailed Someone A Toilet Seat

When it comes to pranks, you're an expert, mostly because you've memorized everything Fred and George ever did. From mailing toilet seats to devising clever ways to get out of schoolwork, you're the master and everyone else just has to accept it.

6. You Have The Urge To Jump Into Fireplaces And Yell Things

You know that floo powder isn't real. But still. You definitely would've spoken more clearly than Harry did.

7. You Have The Urge To Stand In Toilets And Flush Them

What if it takes you to the Ministry of Magic??

8. Old Bars And Pubs Catch Your Eye

You're determined to be different than the rest of the Muggles rushing past. If the Leaky Cauldron or the Three Broomsticks is around, you'll be the first to find it.

9. You're Convinced Your Scars Have Special Powers

You had a slight pain in that appendectomy scar once, and now you're convinced that you can sense when evil is near.

10. You Imagine Paintings Moving In The Corner Of Your Eye

Maybe it was just a trick of the light, but you're sure you saw that portrait on the wall blink.

11. You Think About Whose Hair You'd Use For A Polyjuice Potion

There are plenty of potions you'd love to get your hands on (hello, Felix Felicis), and you spend plenty of time thinking about what you'd do if you had them. Who would you disguise yourself as with Polyjuice potion? What would Amortentia smell like to you? What secrets could you discover with a drop of Veritaserum?

12. Socks Are Really Meaningful To You

Maybe some people wouldn't want to receive socks as a present, but you know from Dobby and Dumbledore that socks are pretty special.

13. You've Given Someone A Single Tissue As A Present

Speaking of presents, you've at one point or another wrapped a single tissue and given it to your HP-loving friend as a gift. And they loved it, obviously.

14. You Argue Extensively About What House You'd Be In

Determining what house you'd be in, what form your Patronus would take, what type of wand you'd have, etc. etc., is of vital importance. The discussion will go on forever. Your non-HP-loving friends will never understand why you can't drop it, and why you need to buy everything in your house colors, but that will never stop you from bringing it up 24/7.

15. You Wish Your Memory Could Be Wiped So You Could Read The Series Again For The First Time

You're jealous of people who get to experience reading Harry Potter for the first time. And you wouldn't really hate it if someone Obliviated your memory, for the sake of reading it all over again for the first time. But truly, when it comes down to it, you wouldn't trade your HP memories (however weird some of them are) for anything.

Images: Warner Bros (15)