Entertainment

How To Throw The Best Chrismukkah Ever

by Mary Grace Garis

With the holiday season underway, many of us are faced with that old-time dilemma: You want your menorah or a candy cane? Christmas or Hanukkah? Well, on this pop-culture obsessed space of the Internet, you don't have to choose: multiple re-watches of The O.C. have taught me how to throw a perfect Chrismukkah, The O.C.'s Seth Cohen's favorite holiday creation. And, as we're closing in on another night of Hanukkah, it's time to catch up and get this party started.

Now, my only qualm about celebrating Chrismukkah, on my end, is this: is it wrong if you're decidedly not Jewish, and you decide to embrace the best parts of Hanukkah for this melded holiday? I mean, Ryan got around it because he was an adopted Cohen, and various O.C. women (Summer, Marissa, Anna, and Lindsay that one year) got around it because they came with Ryan and Seth. But could I do it?

I think Seth would agree the Chrismukkah belongs to all of us, and he would be thrilled we're partaking in this magic holiday. This is all you need to do to make the season bright... with strung lights and candles alike.

1. Deck The Halls With Boughs Of Holly... And A Menorah

The glorious thing about Chrismukkah is that you can keep the tree to trim for later, and fire up the menorah day by day. Which is good because...

2. You Celebrate With Eight Days Of Presents, Followed By One Day Of Many Presents

That's collectively nine days of presents, which is only mildly exhausting to your bank account this year, I think.

3. Make Good Use Of The Seth Cohen Starter Pack

Not that you wouldn't any other time of the year. In any case, pop in a DVD of The Goonies, delve into a copy of The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, and put on a musical melange of The Shins, Bright Eyes, and, of course, Death Cab For Cutie.

4. Compose A Chrismukkah Hymn To The Tune Of Death Cab For Cutie's "A Lack Of Color"

I mean, this was implied, right?

5. Invite All The People You Care About, Including The Chrismukkah Love Interests Of Past, Present, And Future

As we touched upon earlier, Chrismukkah is supposed to be an inclusive holiday. And hey, more presents!

6. Have A Love Triangle Implode In Front Of Your Very Eyes

That way, going back to school after break will be super uncomfortable!

7. But Don't Make Any Choices

To reiterate, there's no choosing in Chrismukkah.

8. Have The Yamaclauses On Hand... Or Head

The most perfect accessory for the season.

9. Pair Egg Nog And Latkes For A Delightful Chrismukkah Treat

Mmmm, that sounds like it would... definitely mix well.

10. Don't Let Anyone Tell You That Chrismukkah Is Ruined For Any Reason

I don't care if your new girlfriend is revealed to be your adopted grandfather's lovechild, Chrismukkah is unruinable, you hear me? A Chrismukkah miracle can sweep in and save this disaster at any minute.

11. Get Some Chinese Food And Settle Down With A Chrismukkah Classic

Your options are Fiddler On The Roof, It's A Wonderful Life, or Sylvester Stallone's Over The Top. So Festive!

12. Or Hey, Hit Up CW Seed And Play All The Christmukkahs While You Down General Tso's Chicken

To recap, there's "The Best Chrismukkah Ever," "The Chrismukkah The Almost Wasn't," "The Chrismukkah Bar-Mitzvukkah," and to a lesser extent, "The Chrismukk-huh."

And that should just about cover it! Merry Chrismukkah, everyone!

Images: Warner Bros. Television; Giphy (12)