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Hey Ted Cruz, Purple Unicorns Are Real

by Abby Johnston

Beauty queens are trained not to say certain things, right? So why can't politicians understand that there are certain (fairly obvious) things that will make Twitter go insane? Well, the GOP debate proved, once again, that politicians have no idea how the Internet works: Ted Cruz went after purple unicorns under the same breath as moderate rebels. Twitter, of course, went crazy.

This is hysterical for a few reasons. Did Cruz bring the unicorns into the debate as a dare? Like did someone offer to donate a lot of money to his campaign if he managed to somehow work "purple unicorn" into an answer? That seems slightly plausible.

Barring that explanation, why on earth did Cruz need to specify that purple unicorns are rare? Is he comparing to, oh, I don't know, yellow, green, or blue unicorns? Or even white unicorns?

Maybe the Twitterverse could've forgiven Cruz if he had just stuck to regular ol' mythical creatures. But with that comment, the Texas Senator put a challenge out to Twitter: Find me a purple unicorn. And oh, did the Internet deliver.

Oh, I bet they like this one!

Somehow I feel like this is definitely not what Cruz meant.

There was a whole other section of Twitter that developed a sort of conspiracy theory about Cruz — that he was a Brony.

Which, uh, apparently has been a theory even before this debate...? Note the date on these next few.

Wow. OK. So this is a thing! Maybe we've just learned something about the man who is threatening to derail Donald Trump's seemingly constant lead in the polls. Maybe we've just learned that a likely candidate for the Republican nomination could, indeed, be an adult man who is a My Little Pony enthusiast.

This Freudian slip, if it produces anything substantial from his personal life, could sink his presidential aspirations, but I have one thing to say if Cruz is a closeted enthusiast: Brony on, man. Brony on.