Entertainment

Can Kanye West Be The Next 'American Idol'?

by Mary Grace Garis

When we heard a few months back that Kanye West auditioned for American Idol, the resounding response was, “It’s about time.” Like, we should be honored by his lateness, that he would even show up to this about-to-end TV show. Anyway, as a special treat, E! Entertainment finally posted the video of Kanye West’s audition, and it is a hell of a performance. But seriously, how does Yeezy stack up against the competition?

Over the years we’ve seen a veritable gazillion American Idol auditions, with more William Hungs than Kelly Clarksons usually making it on air. Sometimes, we’re pleasantly surprised, but overall the entire experience seems very been there, done that. It’s why the rotating door of judges now includes Jennifer Lopez, Keith Urban and Harry Connick Jr. But stacked up against former American Idol auditioners, does Kanye deliver? Is he convincing in every facet that makes up an American Idol, or is this just an amusing prank? Or both?

American Idol starts its 15th and final season January 6 on Fox, so, until we see the new kids on the block, let’s take a moment to grade Kanye’s performance. You know, in all the categories that truly matters when it comes to an American idol.

Song Choice

Whoa, "Gold Digger?" I think, when that hit the radios, people were still complaining about MTV not playing music anymore (it was long before we accepted as a society that it's a channel of reality television and the occasional scripted show). So, there's a part of me that feels, hmmmm, are we past "Gold Digger" as a nation? And then the rest of me decided that this was the most bomb song of 2005, so, yeah, this totally works as a stellar throwback track.

Grade: A-.

Originality

The thing is, it's original in the sense that he wrote it. It's not-so-much original in the sense that the judges are singing along, so like... it definitely isn't "A Moment Like This" moment, you know?

Grade: C+.

Kissing Up To The Judges

Oh, come on, everybody does it. Kanye takes it to the next level by picking a song that includes Lopez's name in the lyrics... with fun compliments about her figure. To recap the exquisite line, the lyrics go: "My psychic told me she have a ass like Serena/Trina, Jennifer Lopez, four kids/And I gotta take all they bad ass to show-biz." Top-tier butt kissing there. But, eh, do you really want to be praising someone's butt when you know your very pregnant wife, Kim Kardashian West, the veritable Queen of the Badonk, is gonna watch later?

Grade: B.

Keeping Up With The Kardashians (On Another Show)

I'm gonna front with you guys: real-life contestants usually aren't able to pull out their reality show spouses to cut in line. It's a power move, no doubt, but not a respectable one.

Grade: D+.

Magnitude Of Bleeps On A Show That Mainly Caters To My Mom

Well, my mom, other peoples' moms, I think the general demographic of American Idol in Season 15 is very mom-intensive. Anyway, re: beeps, there are so many! So, so many! Somewhere down in Florida Mrs. Garis is clutching her pearls! But, otherwise it made me laugh, like a true audition should.

Grade: B+.

Humbleness

Look at this man from the Southside of Chicago. He is totally void of ego. It's incredible!

Grade: A++++.

Overall Kanye delivers a respectable B performance, with points mainly taken away because bringing in a Kardashian is cheating, omigosh. I guess time will tell if he can really cut it as a rapper. Good luck with all that.

Images: Giphy (6)