Entertainment

'Josie' Songs That Don't Make Sense

If you think remakes and reboots are a recent thing in Hollywood, I can assure you they were even around 15 years ago. Case in point: 2001 movie Josie and the Pussycats, which was a live action feature version of the Archie Comics and the popular Hanna-Barbera cartoon. The movie was subversive and sleek with a soundtrack filled with Josie and the Pussycats songs that didn't make any sense. Don't get me wrong — the soundtrack is pure pop perfection at its finest and it all kind of makes sense within the context of the movie. Kind of.

The movie version of Josie and the Pussycats follows the rise of a the female rock band, whose members soon realize that their record label is pretty shady and into sending out subliminal messages to the masses. It's a subversive movie that makes a statement about how commercialized the music industry can be and I think the soundtrack makes its own statement about how manufactured pop music can be — complete with easy-to-digest, catchy tunes. I'm not complaining about the songs at all, but I am saying that if you read the lyrics to the soundtrack songs by themselves, they will not make any sense.

Check the songs below.

1. "Three Small Words"

Pretty sure the formula for this song is "adjective adjective noun" for most of the song, which hides under a very catch guitar riff. I think the song is about a guy who refuses to say I love you, but listeners never actually find out what those three small words are. Cliffhanger!

2. "Pretend To Be Nice"

So this song is about a jerk who the singer loves, but he treats her like garbage, insults her, and " disappears for a week at a time." You know what doesn't make sense here? Why she's putting up with his crap and singing a love song about it. Girl, devote your time and music to someone better.

3. "Come On"

In this song, the singer encourages her man to pursue a casual relationship with her — you go, girl. But after singing about not wanting a commitment and just having fun, she calls him "boyfriend" in a verse. Mixed messages much?

4. "I Wish You Well"

Is this a break up song? Or is it a conversation with a selfish person who always turns the topic back to them? Because I'm trying to figure it out. The tune begins with well wishes but then the singer turns it back on herself, wishing "myself all of the above."

5. "Du Jour Around The World" By Du Jour

Naturally, there would be a boy band in the mix. And yup, their name is Du Jour, which means "for the day" in French. How appropriate. The song is pretty much about them singing about themselves and how famous they are. According to this song, this is what fame is to them: rocking the mic, riding on your motorbike, kicking it in the Benz, banging around the world, making you jealous, meeting different girls on tour, and flying high in all kinds of weather. Okay then.

6. "Back Door Lover" By Du Jour

Is this song about a stalker or anal sex? You make the call, but I'd say it's pretty obvious. A little too obvious and not subtle at all. The lyrics are hilarious double entendres ("I'm your back door lover / Coming from behind"), but it's hard for me to believe that this song became a huge hit in the Josie universe without tons of controversy.

I'd also like to note that Du Jour only seems to film music videos in that Target-looking plane.

7. "You're A Star"

The song starts out with lyrics assuring the singer's feeling good and fine, but then the tune makes a statement about movies, magazines, TV and shopping malls, saying they should go play music instead. Wait, what? According to this song, the opposite of shopping and pop culture is music, which is part of pop culture.

8. "Real Wild Child"

To the tune of "Wild One," this song is all talk about being wild, but not a lot of illustration of that fact.

9. "Spin Around"

First, the song states the singer waiting for someone to "come back home" and she's waiting for someone to "take the time, to change my mind." But then the chorus just goes off the rails. The singer stares at the sun, but "it gets dark inside / but I don't mind." Then, the singer states that they do mind! Which is it?

While the Josie and the Pussycat songs are super catchy, I can't say they make a whole lot of sense.