Entertainment

Pharrell's New Song Sounds Absurd

by Christine DiStasio

Pharrell's on top of the world right now — and things are seriously weird up there. The singer racked 'em up at the Grammys last month, just dropped a new, surprisingly feminist album called G I R L, and his Oscar-nominated song, "Happy," just beat an Academy Awards record. So what's next for the seemingly immortal man who's ruling Hollywood? Pharrell is producing a "rodeo song" for Usher to celebrate the Chinese Year of the Horse.

During a recent interview with GQ, Pharrell took a phone call from fellow hit-maker Usher (or "Ush" as he appears in the artist's phone) where he tried to convince him to jump on board with an interesting project. Pharrell is producing a "rodeo song" (not sure what a that exactly means) titled "Year of the Horse" and he wants Usher to perform it as his introduction into the "rodeo world". I guess when you're one of the top producers in the music industry, you can just do whatever you want — including create a merger between R&B and the competitive horse riding arena.

Does this sound weird to you? Well, it should because it is incredibly weird. And it only gets weirder from here with these quotes from the "Happy" singer's phone call with Ush:

Look at what happened when Ginuwine did "Pony" and he had the mechanical bull.

Pharrell is trying to convince Usher to work on this project by citing the classic 1996 Ginuwine video where the R&B singer dances in a sleazy roadhouse with his shirt unbuttoned and then one of his lady friends rides a mechanical bull.

Now, that was Ginuwine. We’re talking about you, and bringing you to the rodeo world with a record that gives you the license to do that.

So, "Year of the Horse" is supposed to give Usher the license to take on a previously untapped market — the rodeo world. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? And what is a rodeo song, Pharrell?

This is a time for everyday people!

Wait, so "everyday people" are people who are living in the rodeo lifestyle? Rodeo stars travel all over to compete in front of crowds of hundreds of people — they're hardly "everyday people". Hmmm.

Let’s speak metaphorically through the rodeo world!

What... the... hell DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? This bizarre suggestion was followed by the even more bizarre justification for Usher blindly agreeing to record a song and shoot a video for Pharrell's rodeo song passion project.

I fucking held a lamb in a Robin Thicke video. And people were into it!

I guess we were? But watching you sing, "You're the hottest bitch in this place," was kind of strange even if was overshadowed by all of that other controversy that "Blurred Lines" stirred up.

We get it Pharrell, everything you touch turns to gold. But we're not so sure that you'll be able to win over the "rodeo scene" as easily as you think you can.