Entertainment

Is This The Real Reason Paula and Robin Split?

by Jenny Jaffe

Sounds like it wasn't exactly a clean break for Robin Thicke and Paula Patton. Star magazine is reporting that the polyamorous couple split when it was discovered that Thicke was cheating on Patton with a massage therapist named Jasmine that the couple had been seeing together. That's obviously some pretty shady stuff on Mr. Thicke's part, but it's important that the reasons why they broke up are not misinterpreted.

I sincerely hope that the narrative here does not become "They divorced because polyamory inherently makes for a bad relationship". That's not what these reports imply at all- their marriage dissolved because Robin Thicke acted outside the established rules that he and Paula Patton had agreed upon. The only way for a non-monogamous (or monogamish) relationship to work is for both partners (or, you know, however many partners there are) to clearly communicate their needs and boundaries to one another, and for those needs and boundaries to be respected by their partner(s). If Thicke and Patton agreed that they could both see Jasmine, but only as a unit, and then Thicke went and slept with Jasmine on his own anyway, that's still cheating, even if the parameters may look a little bit different than they do in a monogamous relationship.

Again, these are all rumors- perhaps "a massage therapist named Jasmine" was never involved outside the imaginations of the writers for Star magazine. But, as there are so few openly polyamorous or non-monogamous celebrity couples, when an opportunity to open up a discussion about practical non-monogamy comes along, it's important that we take it.

Remember: both physical AND emotional consent are important in any relationship- no matter what anyone might say about "Blurred Lines"!