Entertainment

Did 'Burn Notice' Just Become an Anti-Drug PSA?

by Molly Fitzpatrick

In case you missed last week's Burn Notice, Mike totally boned a lady who isn't Fi. I know, right?

Mike sadly stares out onto a lake from a dock, presumably reminiscing about all that boning. He's asked Fionna to meet him there, and awkwardly reveals to his True Love that he, again, totally boned Sonya. Is his telling her this, as he insists, necessary for the successful completion of their mission, or is part of him hoping that she will realize how much she misses that sweet, sweet Westen boning herself? (I promise I won't use the word "boning" again. Except for right now. Boning.)

Back at Sonya's place, their courtship continues in the traditional manner: She tases him. Mike is escorted to an undisclosed location to be brutally interrogated by her boss, and locked inside a sensory deprivation chamber between questions. This makes every job interview I've ever had look like a bowling alley birthday party with pizza and ice cream cake.

The boss injects Mike with a truth serum slash hallucinogen. Fi appears to her ex in a drug-induced dream, pleading with him not to give up any compromising information.

The next line of questioning sends a zonked-out, sweaty Mike back to a snowy forest with Larry Sizemore. He admits to making a tactical mistake in an early recon mission with Larry. Blinded with anger, he consciously blew up a building full of people. The grief, clearly, is harrowing for Mike: "The people in the factory... Sometimes I hear them scream."

As the boss tries to sniff out his loyalty (don't mention the CIA! don't mention the CIA!), Mike spaces out, envisioning a fight with his abusive father.

Mike faints, with no memory of what he told the boss—but according to Sonya, whatever he said convinced the man that Westen had betrayed him. Apparently risking her own life, Sonya sneaks him out of the building.

Suddenly, inspired by an imagined encounter with himself as a child, he staggers away from her. He's taken back to the boss, who points a gun at him. "You won't pull that trigger," Mike insists, "I have nothing to hide."

...TEST PASSED. He didn't actually give up any secrets before he passed out.The boss shakes his hand: "Welcome to the family."

Ugh. Burn Notice is so good, you guys.

Image via USA