He Gave the Best World Cup Pep Talk Ever

Whether you're a soccer fan or not, it's impossible to be on the Internet and not know that the United States is playing Germany on Thursday. This highly anticipated match-up has a lot of blood pressures rising, but, as usual, the United States football fans are confident that their team will win — especially now that they've got a celebrity player as their ace in the hole. On Wednesday night, Will Ferrell gave a speech at a pep rally in Recife, Brazil, after being introduced by the Teddy Roosevelt Guy aka Teddy Goalsevelt and United States Soccer Federation President Sunil Gulati. If you weren't already pumped up, you will be after this talk.

"I am so honored to be playing tomorrow," Ferrell joked as he addressed the cheering audience. "I'm not gonna lie to you, I'm not in the best shape. I'm not in soccer shape right now, but I'm gonna try my best and I'm going to live up to the spirit of this American team."

He then went on to assure everyone that he was absolutely willing to "bite every single German player" if the game got tight, referencing the infamous moment during the Uruguay v. Italy match in which Luis Suarez bit Giorgio Chiellini. Those of us still laughing over the hundreds of Internet memes the world managed to squeeze out of that moment can now rest easy knowing that Will Ferrell is perfectly willing to chomp down on our enemies like a curly-haired Pac Man to assure our victory against Germany.

Between Ferrell's surprise appearance and Teddy Goalsevelt leading the crowd in a chant of, "I believe that we will win!", tensions are going to be at an all time high as everyone tunes in to the United States v. Germany match. Even if the United States doesn't win, at least we can now all cheer ourselves up by imagining how the match would have gone if Will Ferrell really had been substituted in for a player.

Maybe the amazing drumming skills Ferrell displayed in his drum-off with Chad Smith would have translated to one hell of an effective goalie. Watch the speech below.