The Sneaky Way to See 1D in Concert

If you're over a certain age, there's a stigma attached to going to a One Direction concert. First of all, you have to acknowledge that everyone in the audience around you was probably driven here by their parents. Second of all, you have to acknowledge that every single member of the band you're cheering for is younger than you. Third of all, you have to acknowledge that you're at a One Direction concert. This is the band that caught hell when Louis Tomlinson and Zayn Malik were caught smoking weed in a country where it was legal to do so because parents were busy screaming, "THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" One can't simply go to a One Direction without big sunglasses and a trench coat, is all I'm saying. Unless, of course, you're going to the One Direction concert movie coming out in October.

One Direction has already had one mildly successful concert movie called This is Us, following in the tradition started by Justin Bieber and Katy Perry. How are they going to top that? By not trying, apparently. Where We Are — The Concert Film, which will follow the boys on their 2014 Where We Are stadium tour, is bragging an opening of 10,000 screenings on 3,000 screens across 50 territories, but the film is only going to be playing for a single weekend, October 11 to October 12. That's right. You can see One Direction anywhere in 50 territories, but for two days only.

In addition to the actual concert itself, Where We Are — The Concert Film will also include behind-the-scenes footage and a 15 minute interview that, knowing One Direction, is probably just 15 minutes of them pretending to answer questions in between goofing around. Tickets go on sale starting July 28th. Honestly, concert films might seem like a silly idea, but it's a cheaper way to see a band you're mildly ashamed to be a fan of in concert without having to stray too far away from your house.

In fact, the pros of seeing One Direction in concert film far outweigh the cons.

PROS

• It's dark, so no one will know you're older than even the oldest member of One Direction.
• You can probably sneak into the Where We Are theater from another theater so you don't even have a ticket as evidence. (Not that I recommend this, of course.)
• If you sit in the back row, people will assume you're not paying rapt attention to the film and taking notes on how to master the fine art of Harry Styles' man bun.
• It will probably take up less time of your life than actually going to a concert would.
• It's a lot easier to lie to your roommate about where you're going.

CONS

• There goes two hours of your life.
• You'll feel silly for spending money on this when it's going to be on HBO for free in a few months anyway.
• Your friends won't know you went, but you'll always know you went.

With those as the only cons, you may as well start practicing the coordinated clicks that will secure your tickets to the One Direction one weekend extravaganza. After all, say what you want about One Direction, but they are the biggest band in the world right now and they're all seriously amazing guys. Not to mention "Best Song Ever" probably isn't stuck in your head anymore and it's about time you let them change that.

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