Entertainment

'SNL' Alum Pays Big Time For His DUI

by Samantha Martin

The latest news in the life of funnyman Chris Kattan is no laughing matter. The Saturday Night Live alum — who also costarred with Will Ferrel in the flop A Night at the Roxburywas arrested on DUI charges in February of this year after a 911 call reported him swerving at a dangerously slow pace on the 101 Freeway in Los Angeles. It's a good thing a call was placed, because Kattan — who we've since learned had Ambien in his system at the time — went on to drive his 2011 Mercedes into not only a guard rail, but also a California Department of Transportation vehicle. Scary stuff. TMZ is now reporting that Kattan's sentencing is complete, and it does not look pretty. Here's what his future looks like:

1. He will spend the next three years on probation.

2. He will have to attend a 3-month alcohol program.

3. He will have to attend 104 Narcotics Anonymous classes.

4. He will have to pay a $500 fine plus any restitution for damages.

5. He will have to take part in a Hospital and Morgue program (aka a "scared straight" kinda deal).

None of those five points sound like a good time to me — and it could have been a whole lot worse — so can we just all agree to not drink and/or do drugs and drive? Please and thank you.

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