Kim K. Read 'Fifty Shades' On The Radio

I am one of the four people I know who has not read a single page of Fifty Shades of Grey (and the same can be said about Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed), and to be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever get around to reading it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I would, however, totally listen to the audiobook. Well, on one condition: It must be recorded by Kim Kardashian. “Wait, what?” you ask. “Where the hell did that come from?” Don’t you fret! I will explain. Wednesday, Kim K. read an excerpt from Fifty Shades of Grey on an Australian radio show. And it was great. And I want more.

The on-air reading was an attempt to "break the radio." It did not break the radio. But it did plant the "a Kim K. Fifty Shades audiobook series needs to exist" seed in my mind.

So, this is my humble plea to anyone in the universe who can make the following happen: Please have Kim Kardashian record an audiobook for Fifty Shades of Grey. Please. Please. Please.

PLEASE!!!!!!

If she wants to go for the gusto and come up with a distinct voice for each character, awesome. If she just wants to read the entire thing in her own voice, awesome. I'm not picky. I just want more of this:

And yes, I'd totally be on board if she went through the book and substituted every mention of female nether regions and male nether regions with the words "Fleur Fatale".