Entertainment

We Solved 'The Bach': Here's Who Chris "Chooses"

by Nicole Pomarico

It's hard to believe, but we're already almost halfway through Chris Soules' season of The Bachelor . It's crazy, mostly because it still feels like yesterday that ABC put us through that painfully long three hour premiere, but it's true. After having plenty of time to get comfortable in the Bach mansion, Chris' ladies are beginning to show their true colors — and more often than not this season, those colors are diluted with alcohol. At this point, I definitely feel like I know enough about the women to have my favorites, and it seems like Chris does, too. But how do you even begin to decide who might win (Chris' heart)? Sure, I have my predictions, but is there has to be a better, more precise way to figure out who is about to become Princess Farming. This is why I created this handy formula to figure out who Chris Soules chooses in the end.

OK, so it's not so much a formula as it is a system based off of the statistics by the top three women in past Bachelor seasons. I took the contestants from the past five seasons of the show and figured out what they all had in common, and then applied those characteristics from the women who are still vying for Chris' roses. Some of the data wasn't very telling, but some of it truly was. And despite the fact that I don't agree with the top three according to the formula, it will definitely be interesting to see if the pattern holds true at the end of Chris' season.

First Impression Rose Winners

Although a first impression rose is never a guarantee for a win — and in fact, it practically never is — it is a solid indicator of how far the winner will make it in the competition. The earliest any contestant who won the first impression rose left was when Ashley Spivey was eliminated in Episode 5 of Brad Womack's season. Other than that, it's a good sign someone will make it to the end. This category definitely gives Britt a leg up!

Nutty Careers

The Bachelor is famous for contestants who have totally made up-sounding careers, like Kelly the dog-lover from Juan Pablo's season. Never once did anyone with a crazy career end up in the top three, and in fact, only 20 percent of the time did a contestant make it into the final rounds without a job that also required a college degree. Although Chris' remaining women are for the most part gainfully employed, this would probably mean that Carly, a cruise ship singer, and Nikki, a former NFL cheerleader, are probably out. Of course, these are both real jobs, but "former" doesn't really scream "career."

The Gal Who Gets The First One-on-One Date

This was definitely surprising to me — the majority of the women who were chosen for the first one-on-one date of the season have made it all the way to the end, if not very, very close. This would mean than Megan and Mackenzie — the winner of the first official one-on-one date and the winner of the first unofficial one — are definitely picking up steam.

(Sigh) Age

This is also interesting: No woman over 32 or under 23 has made it into the top three in the past five seasons. That's kind of crazy, right? This only eliminates Mackenzie, age 21, from the running.

The Results: The top two women in the finale — according to this formula and this formula only — are predicted to be Megan and Britt. For the record, without the formula, I totally think it's going to be Whitney and Kaitlyn, but that's just me... although I am looking forward to seeing how this formula holds up when we have our final three!

Images: Rick Rowell/ABC, Giphy (4)