I will never understand how the term “walk of shame" became so popular. While our society certainly has some hang-ups about sexuality, if you ask me, there’s nothing at all shameful about having gotten laid. And that goes for the morning after, too — no matter how many pairs of prying eyes happen to catch you struggling to get home in last night's bandage dress and heels. Having a one-night stand and enjoying it is cause for celebration, not embarrassment or shame. In fact, you should be getting high-fives from every person you pass during your stride of pride.
Although you may not want to remember every one-night stand forever, the simple fact that you went out, had a good time, and owned your sexuality in the process is awesome — and a testament to the fact that each of us are in control of our bodies and our lives. Any shame we might feel after a one-night stand is usually a product of society’s expectations about sex and dating, as well as its sexual double standards for women. Don't listen to anyone who tells you to feel guilty after a one-night stand. Those people should really be focusing on spicing up their own love lives, instead of judging the lives of others. If you can go home with someone and had fun, you should be able wander on home the next morning feeling on top of the world, too.
To help, here are nine tips to aid you in turning that "walk of shame" into the walk of awesome.
1. Don’t Rush Out The Door In Horror (Unless You Want To)
Waking up after a one-night stand, your first inclination may be to run away as fast as you can. And yes, sometimes, that is the right call — we can be totally empowered and in control of our own bodies, and still have times where we want to put a one-night stand in our rearview mirrors ASAP, for a wide variety of reasons.
But if shame is the only thing motivating you to try to run out of there with your shoes on the wrong feet, don't listen to it. Take your time collecting your belongings, or get to know the person you're worried might be judging you. There's no need to panic or stress. (Besides, you know it's going to take you forever to find your underwear.)
2. Embrace That Bed Head
Instead of trying to finger-comb your bed head, or mat it down with whatever product you can find in the bathroom of you one-night stand's house, just embrace the look. There's nothing wrong with sex hair. It makes a statement, and that statement is, "I just had sex." It's hot.
3. Make That Smudged Makeup Work For You
You've been trying to perfect the smoky eye look for years, and now, after a night of sleeping in your makeup, you finally have it. Why would you want to throw all that away? Toss on some gloss and honestly, you're good to go out again tonight, if you want to.
4. Don’t Try To Hide The Obvious
You're walking home at 8 a.m. in an outfit that was clearly designed for a night on the town, not a day at the office. You don't think that every person who looks your way is aware of your situation?
Oh, they know. You know. Everyone knows. And it doesn't matter. No one actually cares. So don't try to do something silly to make yourself look more "respectable," like buying a whole new outfit at the only store that's open. You didn't do anything wrong, so you don't need to cover up for yourself. Just hold you head high, know that you have nothing to hide, and go with it!
5. Give Any Judgey Glances The, ‘Yeah, That’s Right, I Got Some’ Look
Instead of ducking away from the probing stares of stranger, look those people straight in the eye. Give them a a few seconds of eye contact so that you can communicate to them that you know that they know, and that you're so cool with how your night went, you don't even care.
6. Hold Your Head High And Strut
In between making all this eye contact with random people on the street and embracing the reality of your situation, you should also strut like you've never strutted before. You're sexy and awesome. And strutting will make you feel even more sexy and awesome.
7. Realize That You Don't Need To Regret This
Sadly, too many people are walking around the world filled with pointless regret over things that don't actually bother them, but are frowned upon by society. Don't be like them.
Be like you, and you don't regret the harmless things you've done, like having a one-night stand because you felt like it. No one got hurt, and having a one-night stand doesn't make you any different, or any less likely to find a serious relationship later on. Don't waste any time buying into the regret that society says women should feel after having a one-night stand. You're too busy living your life for that malarkey.
8. Enjoy Your One-Night Stand For What It Is
Although one-night stands sometimes develop into something more, they're primarily about having fun in the moment — and that's what's so great about them. They're not wracked with the heavy expectations and pressure that traditional dating usually entails. If you and your one-night stand end up hitting it off, great. But if you never talk again, you're still doing great.
9. Own The Experience
Life is both a journey and an adventure. It's all about figuring out what you like, what you don't like, and what works for you — and one-night stands can help you figure that stuff out, too. If you embrace all of your life experiences (including the sexual ones) with an open mind instead of nervousness, you'll be better off in the long run.
Because while your experiences may not define you, they certainly help to the make you the person you are — both in and out of bed.