Life

Steer Clear Of These One-Night Stand Red Flags

One-night stands used to be very susceptible to the whole double-standard thing. Dudes would get a noogie all "boys will be boys!"-style while women would get the side-eye and judgmental glares. Lucky that's changing, and many champion one-night stands as actual good ideas (in some scenarios, at least). Since we, as a society, are getting more onboard with the glory (or at the very least, a hilarious story one day) that can be one-night stands, we're developing some guidelines such as one-night stand red flags.

Red flags differ from deal breakers in this case, since the latter mean you probably leave their ass at the bar. They say or do something while you still have an easy escape plan—before the one-night stand possibility became verbalized, even. Red flags pop up once things get a bit trickier and y'all have moved on to their or your apartment where clothing may be optional, if not already shed. Red flags, like deal breakers, don't necessitate a direct demand to abandon ship—that's up to you, bb. Like when you follow a hot neighbor home and see only a portrait of Princess Diana in her red power suit on his otherwise blank wall, you could go forward with the plan (I mean sex here), if you want. Choose your own sex-venture but do keep an eye out for these one-night stand red flags, including:

Cats

At least for most dudes, evidence of cats means evidence of a girlfriend who's out of town or otherwise away from home for the evening. I know some single dudes with cats, but not many.

Photos of parents everywhere

OK—I love love LOVE my parents but my photographic evidence of this is limited to one or two photos in my apartment. If there's an inundation of old people photos, chances are you are in this person's parents' home. Sorry?

Mysterious, tiny hairs

BALLS OR FACE? BALLS OR FAAACE??!

See a frightening video compilation of some folks' real life one-night stand red flags and see if you agree:

I'd like to add to the rolling list of red flags: Bobby pins (there's definitely at least one other girl in the picture), a totally clean bathroom or bedroom trashcan (hiding something, potentially many many used condoms), loose change on the floor in a woman's room (dudes have been and will probably continue to be there), "muscle milk" ("no"). Obviously, everyone is different and clearly compromises must be made. Shoutout to my Princess Di fan. Missin' you.

Images: YouTube(4)