You Need To Watch 'Million Dollar Shoppers'

Real Housewives, Breaking Amish, Dance Moms have just been usurped. Lifetime has come out with the best reality program on television, and it's got all of the drama, extravagance, and scripted ridiculousness you love with the added appeal of a fresh new cast and lots of really expensive clothes. Love male cross-dressers and Alexander Wang? Can't get enough of catty arguments between middle-aged blondes, but wish there were more color-coded closets involved? We thought so. It's time for you to meet Million Dollar Shoppers , the show about high profile personal shoppers and the clients who hire them. No, this is not a throwback to the olden days of The Rachel Zoe Project. You will not meet the Joy Bryant's and Anne Hathaway's of the world, but instead footballer players' wives who refuse to refer to themselves as pregnant and MILFs who don't believe in anything but skintight jeans. If you're not already watching, here are five golden reasons you should start.

Gregg's Outfits

Gregg, the fabulous half of the Tayler Carson Sandvick and Gregg Asher team, dresses in head-to-toe ladies garb while sporting full-on 5 o'clock shadow at all times. His super floral style, showcased in the video below, is reminiscent of a bohemian Twiggy, if Twiggy was a dude in a dress with some mad facial hair. But in all seriousness, we die for that floral oversized blazer.

The Clients

All personal shopper craziness aside, the whole point people even consider watching a television show called Million Dollar Shoppers is to see these alleged millionaires and their eccentric lifestyles. The producers behind the show know that, which is why they go out of their way to showcase clients like this bikini clad 67-year-old woman.

The Unfair Judgements

After only a handful of episodes, it's already obvious that the villain of the show is Amy. We're not saying that her clients aren't kind of freaky, but that doesn't mean she has the right to diss them or their friends.

Derek's High-Pitched Screaming

Oh, Derek. He's so bracing, grating, bitchy, and over-the-top. He's everything we ask for in a reality television star. Not to mention he helps women who already dress well by convincing them to wear hideous and unflattering clothing. Here he shrieks and gasps as if his life depended on it, making us think he is destined to be the new NeNe Leakes sidekick. If Gregg Asher isn't the breakout star of this show, it'll have to be Derek.

Did We Mention the Clients?

There are whole webisodes dedicated to how difficult clients are, and how many problems they have – emotional, psychological, and otherwise.

Now that you've officially been converted to the cult of Million Dollar Shoppers, all we have to say is you're welcome. It comes on Thurs. night at 10 p.m.