Life

You Can Send Your Enemies A Potato

by Kat George

Are you the kind of person just waiting around for an opportunity to send your enemies something? Well, PotatoParcel.com had you covered, as they will send your enemies a potato, complete with message of your choice scrawled on it, wherever you want! Given that potatoes are readily available (and much cheaper, as one of these will run you up to $9.99) at the supermarket, and the message is just scrawled on with Sharpie, it's probably something you could just do yourself if you were that way inclined, but I guess the site is a bit of a novelty. You obviously don't have to send a potato to your enemy, you could send it to a friend, but I feel like that would be weird. To my recollection, there are way more ways to say "I love you" than with a potato.

Cosmopolitan's Tess Koman tried ordering the potato with a message for herself, as assessed it thusly:

"... When I ordered my potato, I thought it would be funny to have it say "YOU KNOW WHY." A month later, I am unsure of what I was thinking. Regardless, the potato came all beaten up in a tiny envelope from Dallas, Texas. It was all so ... beige. It made me sad.

Hours later, I am still sad. Why would I send myself a sad potato? Why did it take so long to get here? Why is the potato soft? Potatoes have to go through a lot to get soft. How old is the person at PotatoParcel.com who did this to the Internet, to me?

I take away from it this: Revenge is indeed a dish best served cold. And half-rotten. You know why."

Here's Tess's potato:

And here are a selection of other potatoes purchased from the site and sent off to their respective destinations:

1. This simple potato message

2. This amazing pun-tato

3. This fortune cookie style potato

4. This funny joke potato

5. This nice but then rude potato message

The potatoes have spoken.