Entertainment

'The Bachelorette' Mariachi Date Totally Backfired

Another week on The Bachelorette , another super embarrassing, completely humiliating date for the suitors. In weeks past, we’ve had sumo wrestling in barely there diapers; a singing contest for a spot in Aladdin the musical; and a rap battle. Earlier in the episode, Ben H. had to do the two-step in a honky tonk. And this is just on Kaitlyn’s season. Not wanting to be outdone for her other (or the producers’ other, to be honest) dates, today’s date in San Antonio, Texas, involved all of the guys getting together to form their own mariachi band and serenade Kaitlyn with Mexican songs of love on The Bachelorette.

It opened with a 12-year-old singing to Kaitlyn, which, if I were Kaitlyn, I would have taken that and ended the contest right there, but oh no. This was not to be. Instead, each man had to write their own love song to Kaitlyn and sing it to her in the middle of the San Antonio River Walk. Of course, none of the guys can sing (except for Ian, who says he can sing, but then he was bad and said he psyched himself out, which, okay, dude), and it was painful to watch. That 12-year-old even called out Joe for sucking and being nervous. Way to heckle, kid. I like your style. Nick has an especially terrible voice, but he sang songs about having an erection for Kaitlyn and I guess that went over pretty well.

While I guess this was fun for the people on the River Walk and for Kaitlyn to watch, it’s getting less and less engaging for viewers to watch at home. Why do all of these guys have to do these super-humiliating things on The Bachelorette. While I’m no Bachelorette optimist, I recognize that the aim of the game is to fall in love. What does doing all of these weird activities have to do with falling in love? I get about “putting yourself out there” (a Bachelor/ette favorite quote), but rubbing your body in baby oil and flopping on the ground like a snake searching for mice (that will probably be next week’s activities) is not going to help you find love.

I want to see more of the fun dates of Bachelor/ettes past: helicopter rides, swimming, hiking, and pretty light on the embarrassment. ABC should be focusing more on the guys they’ve choosing (because this is a pretty weak bunch if I’m being honest) instead of the dates that they’re making these guys do. What’s so wrong with bungee jumping?

Images: ABC/Felicia Graham