Books

11 Books About Dating That Will Make You Smarter & Happier With The Whole Process

by Kerri Jarema

The official start of spring is less than a month away. You're almost there, friends. You've almost survived another cold, gray winter. And with the new season on its way, you're probably thinking about all of the springtime activities you can't wait to get into. If dusting off your Tinder profile and getting back on the dating train is one such activity, well, I salute you. But you're probably going to need some advice if you want to make sure that this spring fling is more successful than some of your past attempts. And you don't have to look any further than nonfiction books about dating.

All of 11 picks below delve into some aspect of dating, romance, and relationships that all modern daters will be able to relate to, find comfort in, and gain insight from. Ranging from lighthearted comedic looks at the single life to social, psychological, and spiritual advice, all of these reads are entertaining, easily digestible, and won't make you feel like you're struggling through old fashioned self-help that just doesn't relate to your own dating life. If you've ever wanted to know more about what it takes to turn a fling into a relationship, or just to make the most out of your next date night, add these to your TBR now.

'The Love Gap: A Radical Plan to Win in Life and Love' by Jenna Birch

For a rising generation young women, the sky is the limit. Women can be anything and have everything. They are outpacing their male peers in higher education and earning the corner office at work. Smart, driven, assertive women are succeeding at just about everything they do — except, for many, romance. Jenna Birch's The Love Gap is a research-based guide to navigating that confusing rift between who men say they want to date and who they actually commit to — what Birch calls "the love gap" — and a trailblazing action plan to help smart, confident, career-driven women find their match.

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'Real Love: The Art of Mindful Connection' by Sharon Salzberg

Sharon Salzberg, a leading expert in meditation, encourages readers to strip away layers of negative habits, helping them to experience love based on direct experience, rather than preconceptions. Real Love is a creative tool kit of mindfulness exercises and meditation techniques that help you to truly engage with your present experience and create deeper love relationships with yourself, your partner, friends and family, and with life itself.

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'Save the Date: The Occasional Mortifications Of A Serial Wedding Guest' by Jen Doll

Weddings. They’re fun, festive, and joyful, and they offer endless opportunities to reexamine love and what we want for ourselves, regardless of whether or not our aim is a walk down the aisle. In Save the Date, Jen Doll charts the course of her own perennial wedding guesthood, from the ceremony of distant family members when she was eight to the recent nuptials of a new boyfriend’s friends. Wedding experiences come in as varied an assortment as the gowns at any bridal shop, and Doll turns a keen eye to each, delivering a heartfelt exploration of contemporary relationships. Save the Date takes spirited look at the many ways in which we connect to one another.

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'Things You Should Already Know About Dating, You F*cking Idiot' by Ben Schwartz and Laura Moses

For single millennials, this situation is all too familiar: You're on a date. It's going well! Then you never hear from that person again. Guess you're going to die alone, right? Maybe not! Things You Should Already Know About Dating, You F*cking Idiot, a collection of 100 dating tips — complete with illustrations — that teaches clueless people the dos and don'ts of dating. If you want to laugh, and give yourself a fighting chance at not dying alone, this is the book for you.

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'Radical Acceptance: The Secret to Happy, Lasting Love' by Andrea Miller

Whether you're looking for Mr. Right or are already with him, this is your powerful five-step guide to attaining life’s ultimate prize: unconditional love. Through Radical Acceptance, you’ll learn how to increase your emotional resilience, feel more confident, determine whether you’re settling, quiet those doubt-filled voices in your head, get out of that endless cycle of dead-end dates, reduce conflict, and build a deeply fulfilling, affirming relationship — all through highly actionable advice.

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'It's Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single' by Sara Eckel

It's Not You is structured around the many messages that singles, especially single women, get about who they are and who they're supposed to be. Supported by psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with single women, Eckel creates a strong argument for why you should love yourself as you are. By debunking the myths that have kept single women doubting themselves, Eckel encourages singles to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them and in doing so, allow themselves to be open to a healthy relationship that will last.

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'How To Fix A Broken Heart' by Guy Winch

Yes, a bad first date (or second, or third) can be enough to cause brokenhearted feelings. And through How to Fix a Broken Heart, psychologist Guy Winch urges us to rethink the way we deal with emotional pain, offering warm, wise, and witty advice for the broken-hearted. Through compelling research and new scientific studies, Winch reveals how and why heartbreak impacts our brain and our behavior in dramatic and unexpected ways. But here Winch offers a toolkit on how to handle and cope with a broken heart and how to, eventually, move on to your next great dating adventure.

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'The Curious History of Dating: From Jane Austen to Tinder' by Nichi Hodgson

Dating has never been easy. The road to true love has always been rutted with heartbreak, but do we have it any easier today? How did Victorians 'come out'? How did love blossom in war-torn Europe? And why did '80s video-dating never take off? Bursting with little-known facts and tantalizing tales of lovelorn men and besotted women, Nichi Hodgson's intriguing history of amorous relationships, from enamoured Georgians to frenziedly swiping millennials (and everyone in between) may leave you grateful that you live — and love — today. No matter your own romantic status.

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'How to Be Single and Happy: Science-Based Strategies for Keeping Your Sanity While Looking for a Soul Mate' by Jenny Taitz

How to Be Single and Happy is an empowering guide to stop overanalyzing romantic encounters, get over regrets or guilt about past relationships, and identify what you want and need in a partner. Drawing on her extensive expertise as a clinical psychologist, as well as the latest research, Dr. Jennifer Taitz challenges the most common myths about women and love. And while she teaches how to skillfully date, she'll also help you cultivate the mindset, values, and connections that ensure you'll live your best, happiest life, whether single or coupled up.

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'Unwifeable: A Memoir' by Mandy Stadtmiller (April 3)

Mandy Stadtmiller came to Manhattan in 2005, newly divorced, 30 years old, with a job at the New York Post, ready to conquer the city. Like a “real-life Carrie Bradshaw” she proceeded to chronicle her fearless attempts for nearly a decade. But there was a darker side to the glitz and glamor threatening to surface. After countless failed romances and too many blackout nights, she gave up on love and came to terms with who she was: broken, hurting, and angry. With hysterical insight, Stadtmiller takes us along on her dating adventures both failed, and ultimately successful.

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'Can't Help Myself: Lessons & Confessions from a Modern Advice Columnist' by Meredith Goldstein (April 3)

Now one of The Boston Globe's most popular and most e-mailed features, Meredith Goldstein's "Love Letters" column has created a booming nationwide community of readers and letter writers — over 1,000,000 strong and growing. Meredith divides Can't Help Myself into 12 chapters, each focusing on an issue with which readers are struggling, including topics such as how to cope with dating fatigue and infidelity, work romances and tired marriages, true love and true loss.

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