Life

Your Teenage Self Would Hate You For Doing These Things As An Adult

by Megan Grant
20th Century Fox

Sometimes when I'm bored, I like to reorganize the stuff in my kitchen cabinets. It brings me an odd amount of pleasure; and, of course, as I do so, I think to myself, "My, how times have changed." Maybe you don't organize cupboards for fun, but I'd guess there are still things you do now your teenage self would hate you for. The idea was recently discussed on Reddit, and I learned that I'm not the only one who's graduated from emo Avril Lavigne music and Hot Topic graphic tees to trying to find the perfect coasters and getting the best cash-back deal on my groceries — yet two more things that my teenage self would look at and say, "WTF. Who cares?"

I can remember having that exact reaction as a teenager, watching my parents take such delight in their Sunday morning coffee and newspaper time, wondering why my mom spent so much time lining cabinets in the bathrooms and kitchen, and thinking about how weird it was that my dad cared so much about cleaning the interior of his car. I couldn't wrap my mind around it — probably because I was too busy writing emotional things in my LiveJournal.

But here I am, a full-grown adult — and I can only imagine what my teenage self would think of me. Here's how some Redditors have changed since they were teens; head on over to AskReddit for more.

1

Getting Up Early For Work

We thought that getting up for school was way too early. Then you grow up and get a job, and you learn what early is. Then, your body gets so used to early that you wake up early on weekends, too. Your teenage self would be so disappointed in you, with your responsible bedtimes and your internal alarm clocks.

2

Tucking In Your Shirt

It wasn't cool to tuck in your shirt as a teenager. It meant you were a major loser. Now, tucking in your shirt gives you super powers. Whatever you're trying to accomplish, it always feels as though all you have to do is tuck in your shirt and you'll suddenly have your life together. Trying to score a hot date? Going on a big job interview? Attempting to land a new client? Tuck in your shirt.

3

Staying In On A Friday

The TGIF vibes were real as a teenager; the mere thought of spending a Friday night in the house sounded like a death sentence. Now, we want to be home on a Friday night. As adults, we hate when people try to make plans to see us and be social and stuff. Just leave me alone with my Netflix and chips.

4

Going To Bed Early

This was a form of punishment in most households when we were teenagers. Now, going to bed early is a cause for celebration. It means you've done something right. Getting in bed by 9:30 with your eye mask and overnight coconut oil deep hair conditioning mask? Give yourself a big pat on the back.

5

Driving A Minivan

"Minivans are for weenies!" said Teenage You. Adult You is all, "They're so practical and convenient, and look how much stuff I can fit in it."

6

Wearing A Color Other Than Black

As teenagers, we were very dark and emotional on the inside, and we wanted to make sure everyone knew. So we had black clothes, black makeup, black nails, black everything — you know, to match the color of our souls.

7

Using An Umbrella

We couldn't be bothered with umbrellas as teenagers. We'd simply put on the hood of our sweatshirt and tighten the drawstring. As an adult, umbrellas are essential for wet weather. If it can match my jacket, all the better. But I'm not picky.

8

Wearing Nice Shoes

Our younger selves would wear shoes until they were literally no longer wearable. Half of your foot could be hanging out of a giant hole and you would still refuse to give them up, no matter what Mom said. Now, you buff your shoes with a special cloth. No big deal.

9

Reading

OK, OK. Some of us were bookworms even as teens. But in large part, reading wasn't cool. These days, I can't tear through books fast enough. If I'm reading, don't talk to me. Don't look at me. Don't breathe my air. I'll get back to you later.

10

Being Yourself

A lot of us were so self-conscious and wanted to fit in, be accepted, be liked — even if it meant not staying true to ourselves. I certainly behaved that way, which would explain all the years I pretended to like MTV and hemp jewelry. As adults, I think most of us have stopped caring in that way.

11

Complaining About Teenagers' Loud Music

You know, just like our parents used to complain about us.