Life

This Dog Tried To Run For Governor, But Kansas Officials Said No

by Mia Mercado

State officials have squandered all our hopes and dreams before they even had a chance to be fully realized, saying that no, a dog cannot run for governor of Kansas. I guess Kansas officials don’t want us to be happy. That or they aren’t ready to admit that yeah, you know what, everything would probably be better if we just let a good doggo take over.

According to the Kansas City Star, Angus P. Woolley recently tried to enter the gubernatorial race. Or, rather, Angus’ owner Terran Woolley tried to enter Angus into the race as Angus is a three-year-old wire-haired Vizsla. “I thought, ‘Hey, why not Angus? He’s a good dog, he’s smart. And I think he could provide better leadership than what we’ve had the last seven years in our state,’ ” Terran Woolley told The Hutchinson News, referring to Kansas’ recent governor Sam Brownback.

Brownback was recently tapped to become the Trump administration’s ambassador for international religious freedom within the U.S. State Department. Jeff Colyer, Brownback’s lieutenant governor, then became governor. Colyer will also be running for election in this year’s election for governor.

Unfortunately, Angus P. Woolley’s name is not be on the ballot. “Officially, we will not allow a dog to run for governor,” Bryan Caskey, director of elections in Kansas secretary of state’s office, told The Star. “There’s several laws that reference that the governor has to be an individual or a person, and so we are relying on that, and if a dog comes in to file for office, we will not allow that.”

Angus even had a running mate and everything: Babe, a smooth-haired Vizsla. A cat named Max would have been appointed to be in charge of the Kansas Department of Transportation.

Kansas’ 2018 election for governor is not just a hot race among multiple species: a handful of teens have joined the race for governor of Kansas. Back in September, The Star reported three high school students decided run for governor. As of today, six teenagers had entered the race. This prompted Kansas officials to propose passing a bill which would establish an age minimum of 18 for people who wanted to run for governor. As Terran Woolley told local news station KWCH-TV, that was what inspired him to enter Angus into the race.

What are the current specifications for running for governor of Kansas? Well, there are none. “Under Kansas law, there is no law governing the qualifications for governor, not one,” Caskey told The Star. “So there’s seriously nothing on the books that lays out anything, no age, no residency, no experience. Nothing.”

So, yes, legally a dog or teen or a teen dog could run for governor of Kansas. Unfortunately, per officials’ recent statement, it looks like a canine candidate won’t be the case for this year’s election.

Not sure Angus would have gotten the female vote (from human women or female dogs) as his owner specified his platform would include being against abortion. Angus would also, understandably, be anti-squirrel.

The six teens running for governor, all of whom are boys aged 16 and 17, have varying platforms and, arguably, varying levels of interest for actually holding office. Jack Bergeson, the 17-year-old who was the first to declare his candidacy, told NPR his platform is “somewhat modeled on the Bernie Sanders platform.” Bergeson, who is running as a democrat, supports increasing the minimum wage as well as the legalization of marijuana for both legal and recreational purposes. He states the latter is both a “civil rights issue” and could be a potential source of income for the state’s economy.

Unlike Angus, Bergeson is still on the ballot for governor. Perhaps the world is just not ready to accept the imminent takeover of our canine overlords.