2018 has been the Summer of Novelty Pool Floats, so it is with great joy and hilarity that I present to you the capstone of the season: A bunch of people got stranded on a giant unicorn float in the middle of a lake and were subsequently rescued by some intrepid deputy sheriffs — who also managed to catch the whole thing on video. I feel like there’s some kind of metaphor for life in here somewhere… but also, I will take it for what it is. Because it is amazing.
According to the Chisago County Sheriff’s Office’s social media feeds, the incident occurred this past weekend at a lake in Chisago County, Minnesota. A group of about four or five people (reports are inconsistent) had taken to the lake earlier that day in a gigantic float shaped like a unicorn — but alas, when their magical float drifted into an area of the lake that was, uh, less than pristine, they got stuck in the weed-choked water. Happily, though, a passing pair of deputy sheriffs from the county sheriff’s office spotted them in their distress and offered some help.
Or, at least, they offered their help once they realized there was a problem. Initially, reports the Associated Press via ABC 7, the deputies pulled over to ask if they could take a picture — and, I mean, that’s fair: Even though many of us have undoubtedly encountered giant-sized unicorn floats on the internet before, they’re much rarer out in the wild. The Sheriff’s Office elaborated on Twitter that the deputies were doing a park check when they spotted the float.
Anyway, once they discovered that the people on the unicorn float had gotten stranded, they leapt into action. One of the deputies grabbed a rope, while the other grabbed a phone. The deputy with the rope tossed one end of it to the float-dwellers from the dock; then, once they had caught it, he was able to reel them in. His partner filmed the encounter on the phone.
It’s truly a thing of beauty. Here, watch:
I know, I know — if they were that close to the dock, couldn’t they just… get out and swim to it? I mean, yes, they could have — but also, look at the part of the lake in which they were stranded. Would you have wanted to swim in all that muck? Personally, I would not have, so I can understand if the Unicorn Float Squad didn’t, either. (And, honestly, if their situation had become dire enough, I’m sure that someone on that float would have braced themselves and volunteered for the job.)
Either way, though, something about this whole misadventure speaks to me deep in my soul. And apparently I am not alone; Twitter, too, is having a blast with the story, especially in the aftermath of the Chisago County Sheriff Office’s tweets about it.
A million gold stars to whoever is running the @ChisagoCountySO Twitter feed; their replies are A-plus.
But do they also save flamingos?
Probably:
One can only hope.
It’ll certainly be a story to tell the grandchildren.
Oh, and hey, guess what?
Someone may have identified the float itself or a similar one. If this Twitter user is correct, you can get it for around $280 at Walmart, or around $250 on Amazon. It’s over 9 feet tall and can seat up to six people. Just, y’know, in case your summer has been lacking a certain je ne sais quoi thus far.
For the curious, the lake where it all went down is Fish Lake, according a follow-up tweet from the sheriff’s office. Located near the town of Harris, it’s about 306 acres in size and can be accessed by boat on the southeast shore off of County Road 65. Northern Pike, Walleye, and Bluegill are the most plenty fish to be found in the lake, although a few other varieties, like Sunfish, can be spotted there, as well.
Just be careful the next time you’re considering taking your pet mythical creature to Fish Lake. They just might not be able to handle it.
