There are some things that seem totally mysterious until you get the hang of them — and figuring out how to use a vibrator correctly is definitely one of those things. Many of us are totally overwhelmed (and a little terrified) at the idea of using a vibrator, until we realize how amazing they can be. And, as soon as you start using them, you probably realize that they are, well, pretty straightforward. It's masturbation, not rocket science, after all.
For many of us, vibrators aren't so much a luxury as a necessity. “Vibrators kind of level the playing field for women in the bedroom,” Claire Cavanah co-founded Babeland, tells Bustle. “A lot of women really need the consistent stimulation on their clitoris to have same experience as men have.”
Whether or solo or with a partner, you might need some battery-powered assistance to help get you there. And even if you are someone who can experience an orgasm without one, there's no reason you can't use one to enhance your experience. But many of us don't get the most out of our vibes, because we get too used to our routine. Here's what you need to know about how to use a vibrator correctly, because the great ones have a lot to give.
2
Give Yourself Some Time Exploring
Once you've gotten your perfect vibe, it's time to take it for a ride. If you're underwhelmed at first, that's OK. You may have to use it a few times before you really get the hang of it, so don't be afraid to experiment. "Using your vibrator can range from a quickie to relieve stress, to a full-fledged pleasure adventure," Alicia Sinclair, CEO of b-Vibe, Le Wand, and The Cowgirl tells Bustle. "Mixing up the way you approach your time with your vibrator can drastically change your experience. Instead of trying to reach orgasm as fast as you can, try playing a power game with yourself — like edging. Keep building tension with your vibe, then switch to a lower setting or remove the vibrator all together when you feel yourself getting close to the finish line. Do this until you can’t take it anymore."
Not sure where to start? Begin by getting yourself turned out through porn, erotica, or just a little feeling around, then move into using the vibe on a low setting. Build the intensity as and when you please.
3
Use It With A Partner
You might think your vibe is just for you, but it doesn't have to be. "For years, vibrators were positioned as solitary devices, essentially as something women used when a man wasn't available/if they didn't have a partner," Stephanie Alys, co-founder and Chief Pleasure Officer of MysteryVibe, tells Bustle. "I suspect much of that thinking came from the fact that men not only dominated the media, they dominated the production of pleasure products. For that generation the idea that the man alone can not get a woman to orgasm was ego-threatening. That's starting to change." Especially if you need a vibe to orgasm, there's every reason to incorporate it into the bedroom.
4
Use Lube
"Lube can always enhance any sexual experience," Sinclair says. "Not only does lube reduce friction for comfort, but it also enhances the sensation of the vibrations. Be sure that you’re using a water-based lube with your silicone toys, and always use lube with any toys for anal play."
5
Try Different Vibration Patterns
Also make sure that you're not just using one aspect of your toy. "Explore all of the capabilities of your vibrator to make sure you’re getting the most out of your vibrator experience. Is there a vibration pattern you haven’t tried? Have you been intimidated by the highest power setting? Does the vibrator come with an attachment? Be open to all that your vibrator has to offer, you may find a new favorite way to play."
6
Change Positions
You can also mix up the position to enhance the experience. "Laying on top of your vibrator for hands-free fun is definitely a position that deserves more love," Sinclair says. "Whether you’re on your belly or sitting up right, grinding against your vibe rather than holding it directly to you can add a whole new world of friction. This can also be easily incorporated into partnered sex — try laying your vibe under you next time your on the giving end for oral sex." It'll keep things exciting and keep you from becoming too reliant on one way of orgasming, if that's something you worry about.
Getting used to using your vibrator is easy, but getting the most out of it is something else entirely. Make sure to keep things exciting, because, if you do it right, it's the ultimate way to treat yourself.