Life

The Creepiest Thing About You, According To Your Birth Order

by Alli Hoff Kosik

We all have our quirks... and while I would never suggest that we can blame all of those quirks on our parents (except for me with my weird voice — thanks for that, Mom!), there's definitely something to be said for the way that our upbringing influences who we grow into — including the weird parts. Your quirks might be the result of how people communicated (or didn't communicate) in your childhood home, or of the random family traditions you celebrated year after year. They might even be the result of something as seemingly straightforward as whether you were born before or after your siblings or are an only child! Yes, my friends, you can figure out the creepiest thing about you based on your birth order, and I'm going to break it down for you right here, right now.

Before you pick up the phone and start accusing your siblings or blaming your parents for the creepy behaviors that have followed you around for your whole life, take a breath. All of this creepiness is really just a result of unavoidable family dynamics. It's nothing personal! As a family grows, parents will naturally take on different parenting strategies, according to Parents.com — and this fact, combined with the way that you relate to your siblings as you get older, has a marked impact on the kind of person you will become. Here are the creepiest ways this can play out:

If You're The Oldest... You're Pretty Weird About Failure

According to psychologist and author of The Birth Order Book Kevin Leman Ph.D. to Real Simple, when an oldest child feels like she hasn't measured up to the likely high expectations set by her parents, she "may veer off in another direction." Basically, you are really, really bad at dealing with failure, kid numero uno. When things don't go to plan (or when you feel like someone might be disappointed in you), you might get really emotional, give up entirely, or go off and do something, well, weird. Perfectionism can be pretty creepy, people.

If You're A Middle Child... You're Scarily Good At Negotiating

Middle kids spend their young lives negotiating between the roles of the oldest and youngest child, which makes them well equipped to negotiate pretty much anything else, per Real Simple. Your middle child friends can probably convince you to do just about anything, and while that's a useful life skill, it can also make people feel as if they're being constantly Jedi Mind Trick-ed.

If You're The Youngest... You're More Likely To Be Unfaithful To Your Romantic Partners

For the record, I'm not pleased to be the one to tell you this, youngest children... but according to a study of birth order from BestPsychologyDegrees.com, only about 53 percent of youngest children remain faithful to their romantic partners — compared to 65 percent of oldest children and 80 percent of middle children. Numbers don't lie, but I like to think that you can move away from your childhood habits (the study also notes that youngest children tend to get the least discipline and to rely on their humor and general adorable-ness being rewarded) and stick to your perfect match when you find them.

If You're A Twin... You Might Have Some Telepathic Powers

The rumors are true... and undeniably creepy. The internet is full of accounts of twin telepathy, including separated twins who inexplicably lived parallel lives, twins having the same scary dream on the same night, and twins who can feel each other's physical pain. I'll admit that this is super cool, but those of us who aren't twins can't help but be a little freaked out too.

If You're An Only Child... You're Probably Creepily Mature For Your Age

Only children spend a lot of time with adults, which means that they typically mature faster than other kids their age. There's nothing inherently wrong with some added maturity, of course, but a too-old old soul has been known to make people a tad uncomfortable, especially during those early years on the playground.