Entertainment

Happy Birthday, Xtina! Keep On Vocal Runnin'

by Caroline Pate

Here's a little trivia to make you feel older: today, pop diva Christina Aguilera turns 33. Seems like only yesterday she was just a teenager singing about thinly-veiled metaphors for sex, huh? How time flies. If there's anything that Aguilera will be remembered for, it's her powerhouse vocals. Sure, we had the whole Britney Spears vs. Christina Aguilera battle back in the '90s, but when it came to signing, there was no question of who triumphed. And while Aguilera made some questionable decisions of her own (see: her entire wardrobe in her "Dirrty" phase), when it came to singing, she always knew how to bring it. Case in point: in any Christina Aguilera song, there will be a huge vocal run. Many notes will be involved. It will be a veritable hit-and-run of notes (see what I did there?). So, in honor of the pop queen's birthday, we give you some of her longest, strongest, and hardest-hitting vocal runs.

"Dirrty"

Yes, this video was probably one of Aguilera's most controversial moments (although it actually pales in comparison to some of Miley Cyrus' recent moves). But check out 2:57. Yeah, it may look like Aguilera is boxing, but she is actually defeating that woman with the sheer ferocity of her "whoa's" and "yeah's".

"Lady Marmalade"

Christina Aguilera already has the larger-than-life, Twisted Sister-chic look going on. So at 3:28, she brings the vocal power to match. There's not one, but two, Christina Aguileras. She's harmonizing with herself, that's how much this vocal run is doing.

"Beautiful"

There are a countless number of awkward thirteen-year-old girls who attempted the vocal run at 2:36. Unfortunately, not all of them made it through. Let's take a moment of silence for the many notes that went flat in the process.

"Ain't No Other Man"

Okay, this one practically speaks for itself. Aguilera's vocal run at 3:18 is so powerful that she broke the damn light bulbs.

"Candyman"

At 2:32, Aguilera takes it to the roof. And stays there...and stays there...and stays there for at least 15 seconds. That may not seem like that long, but when you're belting this hot and high, it's practically in dog years.

"Show Me How You Burlesque"

Christina Aguilera wants to hear you say "yeah." No, she does not want to hear you say "yeah," she wants to hear you say "yeah-uh-yeah-uh-yeah-uh-yeah-uh-yeah-ah-ah-ah." Check out 2:35. Do you get it now?

"Do What You Want"

This isn't as much as a "performance" as it is "two women trying to vocally out-vamp each other and oh yeah, Lady Gaga awkwardly rests her head on Christina Aguilera's boob." Seriously, watch from 3:30 on. There are clearly no actual lyrics to this song anymore, it is just a battle of "yeah's" and "uh's" between Lady Gaga and Christina Aguilera. And the best part? In this battle, we all win.