Life

What Happens When the Internet Names Your Baby

Remember a few months ago when we heard about Stephen McLaughlin, a dad-to-be who had convinced his wife to let the Internet name their baby? McLaughlin set up a website for the purpose (NameMyDaughter.com), held a Reddit AMA, the works. And lo! What news? The child has finally arrived! The baby girl was born at 3:42am on Monday, April 7. Alas, though, the McLaughlins opted not to go with the winning name — which, really, is probably for the best. Would you want to go through life with the name Cthulhu All-Spark McLaughlin? Yeah, me neither.

The McLaughlins settled for something that I actually think is quite beautiful: Amelia Savannah Joy McLaughlin. Back when we covered the story on Bustle, “Amelia” was one of the frontrunners; at the time, “Mae” was the favorite on the middle names list, but “Savannah Joy” is equally lovely. Given that the list of names suggested consisted of such Reddit classics as "Streetlamp LeMoose" and "Le-A" (pronounced Le-Dash-A, from the unconfirmed urban legend of a child named as such), we probably shouldn’t be surprised that the “official” winning first and middle names belonged to an Elder God and the Transformers franchise, respectively. But “Amelia” is just as geeky, although in a subtler way: Along with “Rose,” “River,” “Pond,” and “Song,” it’s one of the many Doctor Who-inspired names to have made it to the rankings.

Although, as the Daily Dot points out, much of Reddit was irritated by the fact that Stephen edited the list of names as they went, I don’t blame him — especially since he apparently had to remove the names of several STIs and a couple of sexual positions from the list. Besides, he stated right off the bat that super ridiculous names would be vetoed: “We will ultimately be making the final decision. Alas, my daughter shall not be named WackyTaco692.” Come on, Reddit. That’s just responsible parenting. Don’t beat down on people for being good parents.

And hey, maybe Cthulhu will catch on as a nickname. Word on the street has it that Mrs. McLaughlin posted a Facebook message after the birth of their daughter that read, “All bow down to the great and powerful Cthulhu.” I can think of worse inside jokes to have!