The Latest Fast Food Monstrosity

by Savannah O'Leary

In America, where convenience is key and calories are copious, the new DiGiorno pizza combo package is pretty on point. Containing both frozen pepperoni pizza and chocolate chip cookie dough, the package deal means consumers need not preheat the oven more than once — finally, dessert and dinner can be cooked simultaneously.

Meanwhile, presumably in some dark, dreary basement, a man named Michael Hudson found himself inspired by the Internet’s portrayal of this "progress." He took the concept one step further... to places it should never go. He topped a frozen DiGiorno’s cheese pizza with a tube of Pillsbury chocolate chip cookie dough and baked them together, redefining the term "salty and sweet" for foodies everywhere. It's still food porn — just the really dirty kind.

Recent years have witnessed copious unnecessary combining of countless food items that traditionally do not mesh well: Preceded by donuts and croissants (the cronut), ramen and burgers (the ramen burger), and waffles and tacos (the waffle taco), the pizza cookie is yet another example of creative meddling that ends tragically. I can only hope that we all emerge from this trend with our appetites still intact.