Why "K" Is The Worst Text Message You Can Send

Dramatic people find nuanced insult in literally everything so there is no point trying to patiently translate all of that over-thought, insecure madness to the language of normal, well-adjusted, sane humans. However, one quiet, unassuming habit is regarded as totally offensive regardless of personal drama levels. We've all done it, and we've all had it done to us. It might have taken a few years for the full wrongness of this communication transgression to fully sink in but now we know: Respoding to a text—ANY TEXT—with "k" is the absolute worst thing you can do to another person while in the course of text messaging (or gchatting, or DMing, or...) It sucks even more if the sender of the offending "k" is someone you're trying to date or are already dating. It sucks if it's your friend, neighbor, Tinder match, veterinarian, estranged college roommate, weed dealer, CSA guardian, landlord's slightly cute cousin—literally all relationships have no place for "k" in them.

Because, as any modern communicator knows, "k" is not an abbreviation for "OK" Maybe it started that way, but let's not f*cking kid ourselves: It doesn't mean that anymore. "OK" (or, even better, "okay!") means anything from "I saw this message" to "dude, of COURSE I'm game for breakfast nachos". But not "k". Such a simple letter possesses the capacity for infinite variations of what generally boils down to "eff you". Other hidden meanings enveloped in that "eff you" include but are not limited to:

"And also, never contact me again or I'll set both our bodies on fire."

"By the way, I plan to continue using your sister's Netflix log-in until she notices and changes the password even if this takes two years."

"I never liked your hair, anyway, dummy."

Are we clear? Even if you mean "k" as in the breakfast taco scenario, for the love of Chris Pratt, have an "o" precede it.

Images: aslakr/Flickr