Oh, Spotify Wrapped Day, you divisive, cheeky little thing. If your Instagram feed got a little weird on Nov. 29, you know it’s because the end-of-year stats from the music streaming platform officially went live. And while the top artist, song, and genre breakdowns teach us a lot about ourselves, there is still more to learn.
Wrapped Day might be a chaotic day for brain-melt scrolling, but it is indeed a great day to be a nosy person. Every year, Spotify adds new metrics to teach you a bit more about your music taste, and this year, the new Sound Town feature — which told you which city your music choices most aligned with — really made waves. But there are still some things I’d love to know about myself that Spotify Wrapped — and years of therapy — are not able to tell me. Yet, at least.
Read on for an in-depth list of the Wrapped lists the Bustle staff wishes we could get. We all want a year in review of all of the things we almost bought but didn’t because shipping wasn’t free or statistics about how many times our therapist secretly thought we were annoying. Right?
Your Streaming Archive
- The hours I spent watching Seinfeld instead of starting a new show.
- The movies I had on my list but ended up watching in approximately 84 clips on TikTok instead.
- A Housewives Wrapped that includes my hours watched, franchises I favored, and my top five housewives of the year.
A List Of “Almosts”
- The Peloton workouts I almost did but didn’t because they had Hootie & the Blowfish on the playlist.
- How many bags of lettuce I almost ate but eventually became mush in my fridge instead.
- The number of times I signed up for a workout class and almost went but canceled it to sleep in.
- The days I spent almost scheduling a doctor’s appointment then forgetting.
Generational Differences By Numbers
- The number of times I tried and failed to incorporate Gen Z slang into my vocabulary — big L.
- The number of times I saw Gen Z girls in huge low-rise jeans and contemplated the march of time.
- The number of times I said “slay” to my mom without her asking me what it meant. (Zero.)
- An hour-by-hour breakdown of the time I spent explaining pop culture controversies to my boyfriend including Selena Gomez Browgate, Ariana and Spongebob, and Traylor. IYKYK.
Pet Pie Charts
- A Wrapped for my dog including how many times she woke me up at 4 a.m., how many miles she walked, how many toys she destroyed, and how much money I spent at the vet.
- The number of times I said “big stretch!” to my pet.
- The time spent going into my hidden DMs just to delete spam messages — like the one from @69dayfiance.
- How often I replied "lol" to a meme I'd already seen before instead of just telling the other person I’d seen it.
- A breakdown of the people from high school I immediately unfollowed after they hard-launched their engagement and/or kids.
- Everyone I muted on Instagram with a list of which posts sent me over the edge.