Life

The Funny Things People Do When They're Turned On

by Emma McGowan
BDG Media, Inc.

I talk about sex a lot. I talk about sex acts, about consent, about rape culture, about gender, about kink, about sex work — basically anything sex-related, I talk about it. It’s literally my job to talk about sex and, as a result, sometimes I forget that a lot of time sex is really funny. Think about it: You mush your body up against someone else’s body, both of you produce a bunch of fluids and make weird sounds, and then you fall asleep.

It’s ridiculous! Which is why I was glad both as a sex-positive activist and as someone who needs a reminder sometimes about the funny aspects of sex to stumble across #WhenIAmArousedI on Twitter. While the hashtag itself is a bit cumbersome, the tweets are hilarious. The premise is pretty self-explanatory: People are tweeting about what happens when they’re aroused. However, because this is Twitter, there are more silly responses than serious, sexy responses — and I’m totally cool with that. It’s been a rough 2017 so far and any levity — especially if it’s sex-related — is welcome on my social media feeds.

So with that in mind, here are the 13 best tweets from the trending #WhenImAroundI hashtag. Enjoy! And feel free to laugh out loud. It'll do you good.

1

Salivate Uncontrollably

I think we all can relate to feeling this way about pizza, really.

2

Twinsies!

YOU DO THAT TOO??

3

O Face

Literally everyone looks like this.

4

Poor Location Choice

Unclear which is the problem here: The gym shorts... Or the Petsmart?

5

Cheese Love

And with one tweet, I will never eat Swiss cheese again.

6

As American As...

Dammit, American Pie!

7

His Milkshake Brings All The Girls To The Yard

This might legit be my favorite.

8

Totally Inconspicuous!

No one will ever notice!

9

Me Every Time

I mean, have you ever actually looked at your turned-on face? No? Good. Don't.

10

Awwwwkward

Yup.

11

WWDD: What Would Deadpool Do?

Probably not the best character to turn for guidance but, you know, to each his own I guess?

12

The Best Come On

Definitely effective.

13

Oh, We Know.

(Rooster? I don't get it.)