Entertainment

Selena Gomez's Latest Instagram Is Heartbreaking

Based on her recent Snapchats, you'd guess that Selena Gomez is having a blast while traveling the world for her Revival Tour, and that she was excited to recently celebrate her 24th birthday. But during her performance on Saturday in Indonesia, Gomez got a bit emotional on stage. According to Us Weekly, she told fans how special the song "Kill 'Em With Kindness" was to her, wiping tears away from her eyes. Then she got even more sentimental in a note on Instagram after the show. The singer wrote,

Tonight I felt extremely unauthentic, unconnected to both myself and my music. I’ve never really felt like my materials, wardrobe or a video could define me. I act on a moment and fear something that hasn’t happened. I’m stagnant, I stay still and don’t just sit with myself first and ask 'is this where I am, whole heartedly?' I’ve always told the truth. I’m always true to my word, I’ve shown who I am but I need to rethink some areas of my life creatively and personally. had to get that out.

It's heartbreaking to hear that Gomez is having such a tough time, but it's definitely commendable she's being real with her fans. She also made sure to clarify in the caption that she's "not being negative about anything I've done. I'm grateful for every single moment I get here -Indonesia you were LOUD and clearly inspiring. Love you so much." Gomez is not one of those celebs who begrudges her Disney Channel past or regrets what made her famous, but she's also not afraid to admit things are tough right now — and that kind of honesty is what makes her such a role model in the first place. Sure, she's a celebrity, but her life isn't going to be perfect 100 percent of the time. It'd be exhausting (and unrealistic) to create such a facade.

Although it's unclear what exact aspects of her life she "needs to rethink," it may be time for Gomez to pause and focus on the person she wants to be, versus who her career has made her into. When she says "creatively," perhaps she means making more music that feels genuine. And as for "personally," that could mean who she surrounds herself with. I'd have to guess that being in the spotlight 24/7 is incredibly draining and it makes sense that after constantly being on the go, she needs a moment to catch her breath. It almost must be difficult that when she does take time for herself, like when Gomez went to rehab to deal with her lupus, people will create vicious rumors and speculate about her actions.

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Circling back to her on-stage comments, Us Weekly reported that before performing "Kill 'Em With Kindness," Gomez said:

"The next song, before I go home, is a song that’s so important to me. Because I get really frustrated. I get stupid sometimes. I say things that I don’t mean, or that come out wrong just because I care so badly. But the thing is, at the end of the day, no war in anger was ever won. I do know that deep down in my heart that I have to believe that we can love each other and always be kind no matter what it takes in us. I believe that we can do that, no matter what."

Spreading a message of love instead of hate is one of the best things she can do as a celebrity. And by opening up with her fans and sharing both the good times and bad, it makes her all the more relatable. It also lets her audience know it's OK to embrace your feelings and admit when things aren't the greatest.

Here's hoping Gomez gets some time for herself to sort through those emotions. No one deserve to feel like that, celebrity or not.