Angelina Jolie — beautiful, philanthropic, an accomplished actress and director, and someone who has successfully erased the weirdness of her past (i.e. wearing a vial of Billy Bob Thorton's blood around her neck). And with her husband Brad Pitt, she has like, 40 or so children, whose drawings she wore on her wedding veil. Don't you want to just loathe her but you can't because she's beauty and she's grace, she's elegance and taste? And to add to her long list of annoyingly admirable characteristics, she's also apparently a savior to the common fan. Yep, Angelina Jolie helped a fan out in a big way.
On Thursday, outside of the Daily Show studio where Jolie was Jon Stewart's guest to discuss the forthcoming film she directed, Unbroken, the crowd got out of hand and one fan, "Techna" per her Instagram handle, was overcome by a panic attack. Jolie noticed and went to aid her. Techna wrote on her Instagram of the situation with the actress/director: "Then the guards added another baracade. Chaos erupted to the point. I was getting squished to the point that I started to have a panic attack. She saw me struggling to the point that the security pull me out and sat down. Angelina didnt leave till she made sure I was ok. [sic]"
Don't we all wish we had Angelina Jolie to come to the rescue in times of peril? Here are six situations in which I would LOVE her comforting presence.
A Bad Hair Day
When you get a bad haircut or cut your own bangs too short or crooked, Angie would be there to say in her wise tones, "It's only hair, it will grow back."
When HBO Go Isn't Working
"It'll be back soon. Just get off Twitter, you're only hurting yourself," knowing that you will be scrounging for spoilers to torture yourself.
When You Put a Lipstick Through the Wash
"They're only worldly possessions!"
When Your Food Comes Out Cold at a Restaurant but You're Too Nervous to Send it Back
"You have to stand up for what's right for YOU," She'd say. "Don't settle for cold ravioli."
When You Miss a Student Loan Payment Date
"College is a pyramid scheme," she'll say with fire in her eyes.
When You Have to Shell Out $100 For a New iPhone Battery
"Now now, everything dies," she'll calmly reassure you. "Think of it as ressurecting your beloved. That's priceless." Even though, really, it's worth about a hundred dollars.
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