TikTok's "Last Meeting" Theory Explains Why You Never Run Into Your Ex

After a breakup, it often feels like you see your ex everywhere. There they are in the cereal aisle at the grocery store, coming towards you on the sidewalk, at a random library across town. It’s like you can’t escape them until one day you do.

According to TikTok’s “last meeting” theory, there comes a time in many relationships when you officially stop running into your ex. Often, without even realizing it, you’ll have a “last meeting” where you bump into each other or hang out, but after that, you’ll disappear from each other’s lives forever.

In a viral video posted by @maelexilamb, the last meeting theory is the idea that the universe steps in once you’ve fulfilled your purpose in each other’s lives, and then it ensures you never cross paths again. In her comments, one person said, “I 100% believe this. When a chapter closes, you’ll never see them again, even if you live down the street from them. It’s the strangest thing.”

Another wrote, “I left my ex of five years in a very, very small town and I’ve never seen him again,” while someone else said, “I used to not believe this, but then my ex and I broke up and ran into each other that same night. We were on and off two more times after that. I saw him once after the last time, and never again.” It’s such a common phenomenon that many people on the app are wondering what’s going on.

The Power Of The “Last Meeting”

There are so many examples of the last meeting theory in action, like @meerablackburn, who said she never runs into her ex despite living 20 minutes away and working in the same industry, and @k3irst1n, who said she hasn’t seen her ex in a year even though they live in neighboring towns. Creator @melenachidester even said she’s noticed a misty quality during the last meetings, like it’s already a flashback montage post-edit.

Many people think last meetings mark the end of a karmic journey you were meant to share with a partner. Others say it’s the universe stepping in after you’ve learned a lesson you needed to learn from the relationship. And some see it as the closing of a chapter that gives you permission to move on.

According to couples therapist Thomas Westenholz, it could simply mean something’s shifted for you emotionally. “When you no longer have energetic ‘hooks’ pulling you toward someone, your paths genuinely stop intersecting — even in the same city or circle,” he tells Bustle.

While many people don’t realize they’ve had their last meeting until months or years later, he agrees it’s often possible to tell. “You feel it, a kind of emotional exhale,” he says. “No more ‘what ifs.’ That final interaction may feel mundane or deeply symbolic. Either way, when the nervous system stops bracing for more, the story has quietly ended.”

This is why you might bump into each other one last time, agree to meet for coffee, but then never push to make it happen. Deep down, you know you don’t truly want to see them, and you know it isn’t worth it. This energy shift also explains why your schedules change and you stop crossing paths.

Even though you might wonder what happened to them or think about them from time to time, you’ll get a sense that it’s truly over, and it should feel pretty refreshing.

But What If You Keep Crossing Paths?

The trouble with the last meeting theory is it suggests you still have unfinished business if you happen to see your ex while out and about — but that shouldn’t be the takeaway.

“If someone treats every encounter like a sign, they may be outsourcing closure instead of creating it internally,” says Westenholz. “The real work is asking: Why does this still move me? What am I holding onto? That’s where the healing lives.”

If you do run into each other, for whatever reason, note how it feels. You likely won’t experience the same spark when you see them or the urge to try again, and that’s when you know you can truly move on.

Source:

Thomas Westenholz, couples therapist