Relationships
When you’re looking to keep things frisky but not risqué.
When you’re trying to get flirty with your partner but not fully X-rated, knowing some sexy texts to send a partner can turn up the heat without boiling over. Maybe you’re 30 minutes into your fourth Zoom meeting of the day and you’re feeling a little sensual but don’t want to full-on sext. According to Dr. Carla Marie Manly, clinical psychologist and author of Joy from Fear, sexy texting can feel fun and exciting, especially in long-term relationships.
According to Manly, sexy texting is fun and exciting, but it also helps build your connection. “All relationships require care and maintenance,” she tells Bustle. “When sexual intimacy is nurtured as an important element, the relationship tends to stay very bonded over time.”
Sexy text messages are also great if your initial new-couple, smoking-hot energy has started to fade. As Manly says, it’s easy for the sexy stuff to get put on the back-burner. When family, work, school, and general life take over, you don’t always have time to give your partner some extra loving. Because sexual intimacy is important in a relationship, though, finding little ways to keep the flirty feelings going can help you and your lover feel desired and connected.
Engaging in these sort of steamy texts show you care, that you’re close even while apart, and that you’re really looking forward to that spicy Zoom call. (Wink wink.) Whatever your reason to keep things frisky, these 35 sexy texts are a great place to start.
1
“I’m wearing that black thing you like.”
When to send this text: When you’re out with your friends, getting ready for date night, or on vacation without your partner.
Emoji to pair it with: Sparkles and kiss mark.
How to make it even sexier: “Maybe you’ll get to take it off.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “(My Kirkland brand sweatpants from Costco.)”
2
“Thinking about our night in that Airbnb in Ashville.”
When to send this text: When you’re bored at work, when you’re frisky in the middle of the day, or when you haven’t had sex in a while.
Emoji to pair it with: Side eyes.
How to make it even sexier: Add a specific dirty memory: “I still have rug burn from doing it on the pool table.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “We should get away again soon.”
3
“I just got a new silk pajama set and I’m really feeling myself.”
When to send this text: Nighttime, when you haven’t talked in a minute, or when you need to pump yourself up.
Emoji to pair it with: Fire, nail polish, and pink bikini.
How to make it even sexier: “Maybe you’ll get a selfie.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Maybe we can get you a matching one.”
4
“I was thinking about you in the shower this morning.”
When to send this text: Late morning or if you haven’t seen them in a few days.
Emoji to pair it with: Shower, droplet, and hot face.
How to make it even sexier: “Wish you were there with me.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “You used all my vanilla body scrub.”
5
“Thinking about last night, having trouble concentrating at work.”
When to send this text: After a super-steamy night to keep the ball rolling.
Emoji to pair it with: Hot face, winking.
How to make it even sexier: “Might have to excuse myself from this meeting.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “We should get Thai food from that place again.”
6
“Wearing your shirt, it smells like you.”
When to send this text: When you miss them, in the afternoon, or when you’re not sure if they’re with friends/family who might see their phone.
Emoji to pair it with: Pleading face and smiling face with heart-eyes.
How to make it even sexier: “Wish I could smell your body on mine.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Hope you know you’re never getting it back.”
7
“I think I left my pink panties at your house...have you seen them?”
When to send this text: After leaving their house or if you haven’t seen them in a few days.
Emoji to pair it with: See no evil monkey.
How to make it even sexier: “They must have gotten lost in the mess we made.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I hope you find them before your roommate does.”
8
“Just ducked out of work meeting early...feeling naughty today.”
When to send this text: Later in the day, when you want to feel spicy, or when there’s nothing going on at work.
Emoji to pair it with: Martini, winking face, tongue out.
How to make it even sexier: “You want to get into some trouble?”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Think I may go for a mani-pedi.”
9
“I have a surprise for you tonight.”
When to send this text: Before meeting up or getting ready for date night.
Emoji to pair it with: Sushing face, sparkles, side eyes.
How to make it even sexier: “If you’re nice I’ll give you a sneak peek.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I actually know where I want to eat. that’s it. That’s the surprise.”
10
“I forgot to get you a present, so I have some other things in mind.”
When to send this text: Birthdays, holidays, promotions, or anything that necessitates a present.
Emoji to pair it with: Droplet and smiling face with horns.
How to make it even sexier: “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Was thinking something along the lines of Postmates and Discovery Plus.”
11
“Thinking about what I want to do with you later.”
When to send this text: Before date night, if you’re coming home from vacation, or when you’re going to see each other in person.
Emoji to pair it with: Smiling face with horns, rose, upside-down smiley.
How to make it even sexier: “There are too many things to list.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Want to finally go to that roof bar?”
12
“Still thinking about that threesome scene from Easy.”
When to send this text: When you watched something that turned you on.
Emoji to pair it with: Hot face.
How to make it even sexier: “I sometimes fantasize about it.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “They are such talented actors.”
13
“I like distracting you from work.”
When to send this text: In the middle of the day.
Emoji to pair it with: Smiling face with horns.
How to make it even sexier: “Tell me what you’re thinking about.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Good G-chat banter is important in a relationship.”
14
“I had a dirty dream about you last night.”
When to send this text: In the morning or when you’re apart.
Emoji to pair it with: Sleeping face and flushed face.
How to make it even sexier: “Wish I woke up next to you.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I need to stop eating sugar before bed.”
15
“Made my bed this morning, can’t wait to mess it up with you.”
When to send this text: Late morning or the middle of the afternoon.
Emoji to pair it with: Bed and side eyes.
How to make it even sexier: “If my roommate’s out of town, we can mess up the kitchen.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I probably should change my sheets soon.”
16
“Thinking about your lips.”
When to send this text: Middle of the day or when you haven’t had sex in a while.
Emoji to pair it with: Lips, smiling face with heart-eyes, and sparkles.
How to make it even sexier: “I want them all over me.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Your bone structure isn’t fair.”
17
“You make me feel so hot.”
When to send this text: When you’re feeling yourself or in the middle of the day.
Emoji to pair it with: Fire.
How to make it even sexier: “I love when I’m on top.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I hope I make you feel hot, too.”
18
“Shopping for new panties.”
When to send this text: When you’re out with friends or when you’re bored at night.
Emoji to pair it with: Bikini.
How to make it even sexier: “Picturing what you would like to see my in.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate “I think I have an underwear problem.”
19
“Thinking about your hands on my skin.”
When to send this text: When you miss them or in the middle of the day.
Emoji to pair it with: Droplet or winking face.
How to make it even sexier: “Where do you want to touch me?”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “We should maybe get you a manicure.”
20
“Just saw your IG story. Wow.”
When to send this text: When they post something hot.
Emoji to pair it with: Fire.
How to make it even sexier: “Maybe you can give me a private show later.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “What filter was that?”
21
“My bed feels lonely without you.”
When to send this text: At night or when you’re alone.
Emoji to pair it with: Bed and pleading face.
How to make it even sexier: “What would you do to me if you were here.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I should get my roommate’s kid to come in.”
22
“Thinking about your body.”
When to send this text: In the afternoon, when you haven’t seen them in a while, or when you’re apart.
Emoji to pair it with: Side eyes.
How to make it even sexier: “Wish you were here with me.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Can’t wait to nap with you later.”
23
“Can’t wait to make out later.”
When to send this text: When you miss them.
Emoji to pair it with: Pleading face.
How to make it even sexier: “And maybe do some other stuff, too.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “We can get that weird orange wine you like, too.”
24
“I could tell you what I want to do with you, but I’d rather show you tonight.”
When to send this text: Before date night.
Emoji to pair it with: See no evil monkey, smiling face with horns, and droplet.
How to make it even sexier: “If I can wait that long.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “(I want to show you my new spice rack.)”
25
“Already thinking about where I want to take you on vacation next.”
When to send this text: When you’re bored at work.
Emoji to pair it with: Palm tree, airplane, and cocktail.
How to make it even sexier: “I love getting away with you.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Where have you always wanted to go?”
26
“I can’t wait to spend the whole weekend with you”
When to send this text: Late afternoon on a Friday.
Emoji to pair it with: Kiss face, droplets.
How to make it even sexier: “We don’t have to leave my bed.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I heard the farmer’s market is great.”
27
“You do things to me...”
When to send this text: Whenever you’re in the mood.
Emoji to pair it with: Sweat face, side eyes.
How to make it even sexier: “Ugh, I wish you were here right now.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Our deep convos about movies really make me think.”
28
“I need you to come over tonight.”
When to send this text: Late afternoon.
Emoji to pair it with: Winky face, heart.
How to make it even sexier: “What would you do to me?”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I threw a pizza in the oven.”
29
“I’m so tired this morning, I can barely move”
When to send this text: The next morning.
Emoji to pair it with: Winky face, sweat face.
How to make it even sexier: “I think we need another workout soon.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I should lay off the HIIT classes for a few days.”
30
“Tell me what you’re thinking about right now”
When to send this text: When you want to get them in the mood.
Emoji to pair it with: Winky face.
How to make it even sexier: “I’m thinking about the way you look at me.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I hope you thought about how you need to pick up almond milk.”
31
“I’m excited to get my hands on you.”
When to send this text: Right before you meet up.
Emoji to pair it with: Fire.
How to make it even sexier: “I’ve been fantasizing about you all day.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Holding hands is so romantic, don’t ya think?”
32
“What’s your favorite thing to do in bed?”
When to send this text: When you’re in a new relationship.
Emoji to pair it with: Heart, kiss face.
How to make it even sexier: “What’s your number one fantasy?”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “Personally? I’m a stomach sleeper. So comfy.”
33
“Hey sexy, how’s your afternoon going”
When to send this text: In the middle of the day, on a weekend when you aren’t hanging out.
Emoji to pair it with: Hearts.
How to make it even sexier: “You’re so cute, I can’t take it.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “The oil change go OK?”
34
“I was just daydreaming about our first night together.”
When to send this text: When you miss them, when you want them to think about you.
Emoji to pair it with: Droplets.
How to make it even sexier: “Do you want to recreate it tonight?”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “We were so young!”
35
“What’s the first thing you’re going to do to me when you get here?”
When to send this text: When your LDR is flying in, before date night.
Emoji to pair it with: Smirky face.
How to make it even sexier: “I’ll be here waiting in that lingerie set you like.”
How to follow it if they don’t reciprocate: “I could really use a back rub.”
Sources
Dr. Carla Marie Manly, clinical psychologist and author of ‘Joy from Fear’
This article was originally published on
